e talked for a few minutes
and that made him bold, and he wanted to take liberties with me, but I
told him sharply to keep his own place. Is not that true, Monsieur
Beaurain?"

Monsieur Beaurain, who was looking at his feet in confusion, did not
reply, and she continued: "Then he saw that I was virtuous, and he began
to make love to me nicely, like an honorable man, and from that time he
came every Sunday, for he was very much in love with me. I was very fond
of him also, very fond of him! He was a good-looking fellow, formerly,
and in short he married me the next September, and we started in
business in the Rue des Martyrs.

"It was a hard struggle for some years, Monsieur. Business did not
prosper, and we could not afford many country excursions, and then we
had grown unaccustomed to them. One has other things in one's head, and
thinks more of the cash box than of pretty speeches, when one is in
business. We were growing old by degrees without perceiving it, like
quiet people who do not think much about love. One does not regret
anything as long as one does not notice what one has lost.

"And after that, Monsieur, business went better, and we became tranquil
as to the future! Then, you see, I do not exactly know what passed
within me, no, I really do not know, but I began to dream like a little
boarding-school girl. The sight of the little carts full of flowers
which are drawn about the streets, made me cry; the smell of violets
sought me out in my easy-chair, behind my cash box, and made my heart
beat! Then I used to get up and go onto the doorstep to look at the
blue sky between the roofs. When one looks at the sky from a street, it
looks like a river which descends on Paris, winding as it flows, and the
swallows pass to and fro in it like fish. This sort of things is very
stupid at my age! But what can one do, Monsieur? when one has worked all
one's life? A moment comes in which one perceives that one could have
done something else, and then, one regrets, oh! yes, one feels great
regret! Just think that for twenty years I might have gone and had
kisses in the woods, like other women. I used to think how delightful it
would be to lie under the trees, loving some one! And I thought of it
everyday and every night! I dreamt of the moonlight on the water, until
I felt inclined to drown myself.

"I did not venture to speak to Monsieur Beaurain about this at first. I
knew that he would make fun of me, and send me back