rder to perpetuate
The tuneful Strains and witty Flights,
Of him that Studies while he sh - - ts)
Decree all Landlords, thro' the Nation,
Shall lay (on Pain of Flagellation)
In some meet Corner of their Dark Hole
A cuspidated Piece of Charcoal;
Or, where the Walls are cas'd with Wainscot,
A Piece of Chalk with equal Pains cut;
That those who labour at both Ends,
To ease themselves, and serve their Friends,
May not, reluctant, go from Sh - - t,
And leave no Relict of their Wit,
For want of necessary Tools
To impart the _Proles_ of their Stools:
Then _Cibber_'s Odes, and _Tindal_'s Sense,
_Caleb_ and _Henley_'s Eloquence,
_Woolston_, and all such learned Sophi's,
Would be cut down in House-of-Office:
_Oxford_ and _Cambridge_ too would join
Their Puns, to make the Boghouse shine
Each learn'd Society would try all
(From lowest Club, to that call'd Royal,)
To furnish something might improve
Religion, Politicks, or Love:
Grand _Keyber_, Gormogons, Free Masons,
And _Heydeger_, with all his gay Sons,
Would find to suit, with Lectures there,
Their Intellectuals to a Hair:
_Bodens_ might pick up Wit from thence, and lay
The _Drama_ of another Modish Play.
So wise a Law would doubtless tend
To prove our Senate, Learning's Friend;
Whilst Trade, and such like fond Chimeras,
Might wait more fit and leisure _AEra's._

_From a Window at the _Dolphin_ Inn in _Southampton_._

The Wedding-Night past, says Sir _John_ to his Mate,
Faith Madam I'm bit (tho' I find it too late)
By your d - - - n'd little Mouth, or else I'm a Whore's Son,
For the Cross underneath's quite out of Proportion.
Good Sir _John_, says my Lady, then under the Rose,
I'm as bad bit as you, by your plaguy long Nose:
You have not by half so much as I wanted,
I've more than you want, yet y'are not contented.

_From the Playhouse Boghouse._

Good Folks, sh - - t and write, and mend honest Bog's Trade,
For when you sh - - t Rhymes, you help him to Bread:
He'el feed on a Jest, that is broke with your Wind,
And fatten on what you here leave behind.

_From A Boghouse at the _White Hart_, Petersfield._

Were this Place to be view'd by a Herald of Note,
He would find a new Charge for the next new-bought Coat,
Which _Guillim_ ne'er thought of, nor one of the Herd,
_Viz._ a Wall erect Argent, _Gutte d