; for that every wise man who
intended to shoot himself, took two pistols, that he might be sure of
doing it at once. Lord ------ ------' cook shot himself with one pistol,
and lived ten days in great agony. Mr. ------, who loved buttered
muffins, but durst not eat them because they disagreed with his stomach,
resolved to shoot himself; and then he eat three buttered muffins
for breakfast, before shooting himself, knowing that he should not be
troubled with indigestion: HE had two charged pistols; one was found
lying charged upon the table by him, after he had shot himself with the
other.' 'Well, (said Johnson, with an air of triumph,) you see here one
pistol was sufficient.' Beauclerk replied smartly, 'Because it happened
to kill him.' And either then or a very little afterwards, being piqued
at Johnson's triumphant remark, added, 'This is what you don't know,
and I do.' There was then a cessation of the dispute; and some minutes
intervened, during which, dinner and the glass went on cheerfully; when
Johnson suddenly and abruptly exclaimed, 'Mr. Beauclerk, how came you
to talk so petulantly to me, as "This is what you don't know, but what I
know"? One thing I know, which YOU don't seem to know, that you are very
uncivil.' BEAUCLERK. 'Because YOU began by being uncivil, (which you
always are.)' The words in parenthesis were, I believe, not heard by Dr.
Johnson. Here again there was a cessation of arms. Johnson told me, that
the reason why he waited at first some time without taking any notice of
what Mr. Beauclerk said, was because he was thinking whether he should
resent it. But when he considered that there were present a young Lord
and an eminent traveller, two men of the world with whom he had never
dined before, he was apprehensive that they might think they had a right
to take such liberties with him as Beauclerk did, and therefore resolved
he would not let it pass; adding, that 'he would not appear a coward.'
A little while after this, the conversation turned on the violence of
Hackman's temper. Johnson then said, 'It was his business to COMMAND his
temper, as my friend, Mr. Beauclerk, should have done some time ago.'
BEAUCLERK. 'I should learn of YOU, Sir.' JOHNSON. 'Sir, you have given
ME opportunities enough of learning, when I have been in YOUR company.
No man loves to be treated with contempt.' BEAUCLERK. (with a polite
inclination towards Johnson,) 'Sir, you have known me twenty years, and
however I may have