lost by
contact with our Western shortness and roughness. A happy mean
undoubtedly can be reached; and when it is, the women of new Japan will
be able to bear a not unfavorable comparison with the women of the old
regime.

CHAPTER III.

MARRIAGE AND DIVORCE.

When the Japanese maiden arrives at the age of sixteen, or thereabouts,
she is expected as a matter of course to marry. She is usually allowed
her choice in regard to whether she will or will not marry a certain
man, but she is expected to marry some one, and not to take too much
time in making up her mind. The alternative of perpetual spinsterhood is
never considered, either by herself or her parents. Marriage is as much
a matter of course in a woman's life as death, and is no more to be
avoided. This being the case, our young woman has only as much liberty
of choice accorded to her as is likely to provide against a great amount
of unhappiness in her married life. If she positively objects to the man
who is proposed to her, she is seldom forced to marry him, but no more
cordial feeling than simple toleration is expected of her before
marriage.

The courtship is somewhat after the following manner. A young man, who
finds himself in a position to marry, speaks to some married friend, and
asks him to be on the lookout for a beautiful[11] and accomplished
maiden, who would be willing to become his wife. The friend, acting
rather as advance agent, makes a canvass of all the young maidens of his
acquaintance, inquiring among his friends; and finally decides that
so-and-so (Miss Flower, let us say) will be a very good match for his
friend. Having arrived at this decision, he goes to Miss Flower's
parents and lays the case of his friend before them. Should they approve
of the suitor, a party is arranged at the house of some common friend,
where the young people may have a chance to meet each other and decide
each upon the other's merits. Should the young folks find no fault with
the match, presents are exchanged,[12] a formal betrothal is entered
into, and the marriage is hastened forward. All arrangements between the
contracting parties are made by go-betweens, or seconds, who hold
themselves responsible for the success of the marriage, and must be
concerned in the divorce proceedings, should divorce become desirable or
necessary.

[11] The Japanese standard of female beauty differs in many respects
from our own, so that it is almost impossible for a forei