to the firm of S. and G. Rattar, and may their clients be as
damned as themselves!" he said with a glance at Cromarty, and finished
the drink at a draught.

XXXIX

THE YARN

"I needn't trouble you with my adventures before I came down here to
visit brother Simon," began the prisoner, "for you know them well
enough. It was about a month ago when I turned up at this house one
night."

"How did you get here?" demanded the superintendent.

"I did the last bit under the seat of the carriage," grinned Rattar,
"and when we got into the station I hopped out on the wrong side of the
train. The way I paid my fare wasn't bad either, considering I hadn't
half of the fare from London in my pocket when I started--or anything
like it. However, the point is I got here and just as I'd come through
the gates I had the luck to see both the maids going out. So the coast
was clear.

"Well, I rang the bell and out came Simon--the man who'd got me
convicted, and my own brother too, mind you!--looking as smug as the
hard-hearted old humbug he was. He got the shock of his life when he saw
who it was, but I began gently and I put a proposition to him. I'll bet
none of you will guess what it was!"

He looked round the company, and Carrington answered:

"Blackmail of some sort."

"You may call it blackmail if you like, but what was the sort? Well,
you'd never guess. I was wearing a beard and moustaches then, but I knew
if I took them off I'd look so like Simon that no one meeting one of us
would know which it was, supposing we were dressed exactly alike and I
did Simon's grunting tricks and all that. And Simon knew it too.

"'Well, Simon, my dear brother,' I said to him, 'I'll make you a
sporting proposition. My idea is to settle down in this old place, and
I'm so fond of you I mean to shave, get an outfit just like yours, and
give free rein to my affection for you. I'm so fond of you,' I said,
'that I know I shan't be able to keep more than five yards away from you
whenever you are walking the streets, and I'll have to sit in church
beside you, Simon. That's my present programme.'

"I let that sink in, and then I went on:

"'Supposing this programme embarrasses you, Simon, well there's one way
out of it, and I leave it to your judgment to say what it is.'

"Now, mind you, I'd banked on this coming off, for I knew what a
stickler Simon was for the respectable and the conventional and all
that. Can't you see the two of us