. The fact
is, we all like to be "Colonel" and "Deacon" and "Doctor," instead of
simple Jones, Brown, and Robinson; calling us "the judge" or "alderman"
is a perpetual titillation of a pleasant feeling. "Good morning, Mr.
Secretary," or, "I hope you are very well, State Senator," is a greeting
that carries a kind of homage with it; and from that you go upward in
titular recognition of official eminence until you come to "His Great
Glorious and most Excellent Majesty, who reigns over the Kingdoms of
Thunaparanta and Tampadipa and all the Umbrella-Bearing Chiefs of the
Eastern Country, the King of the Rising Sun, Lord of the Celestial
Elephants, Master of Many White Elephants, the Great Chief of
Righteousness, King of Burmah."

_Macte virtute_ I would say, then, to the peddlers of stars, crosses,
garters, and A. S. S.'s. There are poverty-stricken principalities and
hard-up beys and khedives enough to find ribbons for a thousand American
buttonholes, and to turn ten thousand of our exemplary fellow citizens
to chevaliers. An envious public sentiment might prevent the wearing of
all the ribbons and crosses that a liberal man of means could buy; but
decorations, like doorplates, are "so handy to have in the house." The
centennial year, by bringing to our shores a shoal of titled personages,
has presumably whetted the appetite of our people for heraldic
distinctions. But for years before we had even the village tailor
appearing occasionally in the local newspaper as Sir Knight Shears, and
the apothecary as Most Worthy Grand Commander and Puissant Potentate
Senna. If it is pleasant for Bobby Shears and Sammy Senna to be knighted
by their cronies and customers, how much more agreeable to the American
mind a decoration and investiture from a real prince!

The possibilities, to be sure, are limited. Aristocratic exclusiveness
confines the Garter to twenty-five persons, the Order of the Thistle is
only for Scotch nobles, and the Iron Cross of Savoy is purely Italian;
military or naval services are required for the St. George of Russia and
the Victoria Cross; and it is to be feared that some sort of illustrious
services would be needed even for the Leopold of Belgium, the Iron Cross
of Prussia, the St. James of Spain, or the Tower and Sword of Portugal.
But in the little principalities of Germany, where the people are
ravenous for titular distinctions, there is a large supply; and as, in
fine, there are said to be sixscore orders