citizens and public servants deeply appreciate--"

Thundering crashes, bangs, gongs, hisses, and the scream of a steam
whistle he'd found somewhere.

Arthur was mad.

"So long, Arthur," I said, and we got out of there--just barely in
time. At the door, we found that Arthur had reversed the coal scoops
and a growing mound of it was pouring into the street where we'd left
the MG parked. We got the car started just as the heap was beginning
to reach the bumpers, and at that the paint would never again be the
same.

Oh, yes, he was mad. I could only hope that in the long run he would
forgive us, since we were acting for his best interests, after all.

Anyway, I _thought_ we were.

* * * * *

Still, things worked out pretty well--especially between Amy and me.
Engdahl had the theory that she had been dodging the Major so long
that _anybody_ looked good to her, which was hardly flattering. But
she and I were getting along right well.

She said worriedly: "The only thing, Sam, is that, frankly, the Major
has just about made up his mind that he wants to marry me--"

"He _is_ married!" I yelped.

"Naturally he's married. He's married to--so far--one hundred and nine
women. He's been hitting off a marriage a month for a good many years
now and, to tell you the truth, I think he's got the habit Anyway,
he's got his eye on me."

I demanded jealously: "Has he said anything?"

She picked a sheet of onionskin paper out of her bag and handed it to
me. It was marked _Top Secret_, and it really was, because it hadn't
gone through his regular office--I knew that because I was his regular
office. It was only two lines of text and sloppily typed at that:

Lt. Amy Bankhead will report to HQ at 1700 hours 1 July to
carry out orders of the Commanding Officer.

The first of July was only a week away. I handed the orders back to
her.

"And the orders of the Commanding Officer will be--" I wanted to know.

She nodded. "You guessed it."

I said: "We'll have to work fast."

* * * * *

On the thirtieth of June, we invited the Major to come aboard his
palatial new yacht.

"Ah, thank you," he said gratefully. "A surprise? For my birthday? Ah,
you loyal members of my command make up for all that I've lost--all of
it!" He nearly wept.

I said: "Sir, the pleasure is all ours," and backed out of his
presence. What's more, I meant every word.

It was a selec