er, and the more radical the newspaper the better. A
newspaper will pay half the expenses of a hawker, if he can read. At
every house, particularly every small hedge alehouse, he is received,
and placed in the best corner of the chimney, and has his board and
lodging, with the exception of what he drinks, gratis, if he will pull
out the newspaper and read it to those around him who cannot read,
particularly if he can explain what is unintelligible. Now I became a
great politician, and, moreover, a great radical, for such were the
politics of all the lower classes. I lived well, slept well, and sold
my wares very fast. I did not take more than three shillings in the
day, yet, as two out of the three were clear profit, I did pretty well.
However, a little accident happened which obliged me to change my
profession, or at least the nature of the articles which I dealt in."

"What was that?"

"A mere trifle. I had arrived late at a small alehouse, had put up my
pack, which was in a painted deal box, on the table in the tap-room, and
was very busy, after reading a paragraph in the newspaper, making a fine
speech, which I always found was received with great applause, and many
shakes of the hand, as a prime good fellow--a speech about community of
rights, agrarian division, and the propriety of an equal distribution of
property, proving that, as we were all born alike, no one had a right to
have more property than his neighbour. The people had all gathered
round me, applauding violently, when I thought I might as well look
after my pack, which had been for some time hidden from my sight by the
crowd, when, to my mortification, I found out that my earnest assertions
on the propriety of community of property had had such an influence upon
some of my listeners, that they had walked off with my pack and its
contents. Unfortunately, I had deposited in my boxes all my money,
considering it safer there than in my pockets, and had nothing left but
about seventeen shillings in silver, which I had received within the
last three days. Everyone was very sorry, but no one knew anything
about it; and when I challenged the landlord as answerable, he called me
a radical blackguard, and turned me out of the door."

"If you had looked a little more after your own property, and interfered
less with that of other people, you would have done better, Tim,"
observed I, laughing.

"Very true; but, at all events, I have never been a radica