She looked at him coldly and said, "He will not."
Her brows were heavy and the hand she held at her bosom was clenched.
The rain was beating on the window-panes. The fire seemed diluted by the
day's dampness; and there was a chill spreading through his mind as if
they had been debating fundamental things and the argument had turned
unanswerably to his disadvantage. He twisted in his seat and looked
sharply at her, and though the mirror of his mind was apt to tilt away
from the disagreeable, he perceived that she was regarding him and the
prudent destiny he had chosen with a scorn more unappeasable than any
appetite; and that the destiny she was choosing with this snarling
intensity was so glorious that it justified her scorn. He felt a
conviction, which had the vague quality of melancholy, that he was
morally insolvent, and a suspicion, which had the acute quality of pain,
that his financial solvency was not such a great thing after all. For
Ellen looked like an angry queen as well as an angry angel. It seemed
possible that these young people were not only going to have a mansion
in heaven, but would have a large house on earth as well, and these two
establishments made his single establishment in Moray Place seem not so
satisfactory as he had always thought it. These people were going to
take their fill of beauty and delight and all the unchafferable things
he had denied himself that he might pursue success, and they were going
to take their fill of success too! It was not fair. He thought of their
good fortune in being born strong and triumphant as if it were a piece
of rapacity, and tried to wriggle out of this moment which compelled him
to regard them with respect by reversing the intentional, enjoyed purity
of relationship with her and finding a lewd amusement in the fierceness
which was so plainly an aspect of desire. But that meant moving outside
the orbit of dignity; and he knew that when a man does that he gives
himself for ever into the hands of those who behold him. So he worked
back to the position of the rich, kind old man stooping to protect the
little helpless working-girl.
He pushed the box of sweets across the table, and said in a tender and
offended voice, "You're not eating your sweets, Nelly. I hoped to give
you pleasure when I bought them."
One would always get her that way.
Someone was being hurt. Immediately she had the soft breast of the dove.
"Oh, Mr. James!"
"I wish I could give y
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