That was fringed with a stubble of red,
Who remarked, as he tilted a sorry old tile
To the back of an average head:

"I have come here to pay"--Here the editor cried
"You're as welcome as flowers in spring!
Sit down in this easy armchair by my side,
And excuse me awhile till I bring
A lemonade dashed with a little old wine
And a dozen cigars of the best....
Ah! Here we are! This, I assure you, is fine;
Help yourself, most desirable guest."

The visitor drank with a relish, and smoked
Till his face wore a satisfied glow,
And the editor, beaming with merriment, joked
In a joyous, spontaneous flow;
And then, when the stock of refreshments was gone,
His guest took occasion to say,
In accents distorted somewhat by a yawn,
"My errand up here is to pay----"

But the generous scribe, with a wave of his hand,
Put a stop to the speech of his guest,
And brought in a melon, the finest the land
Ever bore on its generous breast;
And the visitor, wearing a singular grin,
Seized the heaviest half of the fruit,
And the juice, as it ran in a stream from his chin,
Washed the mud of the pike from his boot.

Then, mopping his face on a favorite sheet
Which the scribe had laid carefully by,
The visitor lazily rose to his feet
With the dreariest kind of a sigh,
And he said, as the editor sought his address,
In his books to discover his due:
"I came here to pay--my respects to the press,
And to borrow a dollar of you!"

ANDREW V. KELLEY ("Parmenas Mix").

A GENTLE COMPLAINT

FAIRFIELD, CONN.

P. T. BARNUM, Esq.

_Dear Sir:_ We have a large soiled Asiatic elephant visiting us now,
which we suspect belongs to you. His skin is a misfit, and he keeps
moving his trunk from side to side nervously. If you have missed an
elephant answering to this description, please come up and take him
away, as we have no use for him. An elephant on a place so small as ours
is more of a trouble than a convenience. I have endeavored to frighten
him away, but he does not seem at all timid, and my wife and I, assisted
by our hired man, tried to push him out of the yard, but our efforts
were unavailing. He has made our home his own now for some days, and he
has become quite _de trop_. We do not mind him so much in the daytime,
for he then basks mostly on the lawn and plays with the children (to
whom he has greatly endeared himself)