atchpoles, leave them
at liberty to hunt vermin; or send them to the world, among the dingles
and brakes, to seize the debtors of the infernal crown--for what devil
among you will do the work better than they?" At this moment twenty
devils with packs on their shoulders, like Scotchmen, mounted before the
throne of Despair, and what had they got, on enquiry, but gipsies. "Ho!"
said Lucifer, "how did ye know the fortunes of others so well, without
knowing that your own fortune was leading ye to this prison." But the
gipsies said not a word in reply, being confounded at beholding faces
here more ugly than their own. "Hurl them into our deepest dungeon,"
said Lucifer, to the fiends, "and don't starve them; we have here neither
cats nor rush-lights to give them, but let them have a toad between them,
every ten thousand years, provided they are quiet, and do not deafen us
with their gibberish and clibberty clabber." Next to these there came, I
should imagine, about thirty husbandmen. Every one was surprised to see
so many of them, people of their honest calling seldom coming to Hell;
but they were not from the same neighbourhood, nor for the same offences.
Some were for raising the markets; many for refusing to pay tithes, and
cheating the minister of his rights; others for leaving their work, to
follow gentry a hunting, and breaking their legs in endeavouring to leap
with them; some for working on Sundays; some for carrying their sheep and
cattle, in their heads to church, instead of musing on the Word; others
for roguish bargains. When Lucifer began to question them, oh! they were
all as pure as gold; none was aware of having committed any thing which
deserved such a lot. You will not believe what a crafty excuse every one
had to conceal his fault, notwithstanding he was in Hell on account of
it, and this was only done out of malice, to thwart Lucifer and to
endeavour to make the righteous Judge, who had damned them appear unjust.
But you would have been yet more surprised at the dexterity with which
the Arch Fiend laid bare their crimes, and answered their vain excuses
home. But when these were receiving the last infernal sentence, there
came forty scholars before the court, mounted on capering devils, more
ugly, if possible, than Lucifer himself. And when the scholars heard the
husbandmen arguing, they began to excuse themselves the more confidently.
But, oh! how ready the old Serpent was at answering them too,
no