r.
We entered the lower door, which ever seemed to lie most hospitably
open, and I began to ascend an old and creaking staircase, when, as he
mounted to show me the way, he demanded whether I delighted in
prospects, to which answering in the affirmative, "Then," says he, "I
shall show you one of the most charming in the world out of my windows;
we shall see the ships sailing, and the whole country for twenty miles
round, tip top, quite high. My Lord Swamp would give ten thousand
guineas for such an one; but as I sometimes pleasantly tell him, I
always love to keep my prospects at home, that my friends may see me
the oftener."
By this time we were arrived as high as the stairs would permit us to
ascend, till we came to what he was facetiously pleased to call the
first floor down the chimney; and knocking at the door, a voice from
within demanded, who's there? My conductor answered that it was him.
But this not satisfying the querist, the voice again repeated the
demand: to which he answered louder than before; and now the door was
opened by an old woman with cautious reluctance.
When we were got in, he welcomed me to his house with great ceremony,
and turning to the old woman, asked where was her lady? "Good troth,"
replied she, in a peculiar dialect, "she's washing your two shirts at
the next door, because they have taken an oath against lending out the
tub any longer." "My two shirts," cries he in a tone that faltered with
confusion, "what does the idiot mean!" "I ken what I mean well enough,"
replied the other, "she's washing your two shirts at the next door,
because--" "Fire and fury! no more of thy stupid explanations," cried
he. "Go and inform her we have got company. Were that Scotch hag to be
for ever in the family, she would never learn politeness, nor forget
that absurd poisonous accent of hers, or testify the smallest specimen
of breeding or high life; and yet it is very surprising too, as I had
her from a parliament man, a friend of mine, from the highlands, one
of the politest men in the world; but that's a secret."
We waited some time for Mrs. Tibbs' arrival, during which interval I
had a full opportunity of surveying the chamber and all its furniture;
which consisted of four chairs with old wrought bottoms, that he
assured me were his wife's embroidery; a square table that had been
once japanned, a cradle in one corner, a lumbering cabinet in the
other; a broken shepherdess, and a mandarin without
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