nd-picked by the Duke himself, on whose
property the mines are situated.

* * * * *

UPPER HOUSE COAL COMPANY, carefully selected, screened and delivered
(in the dark), anywhere within a ten-mile radius of Charing Cross at
9s. 6_d_, a ton, for cash on delivery.

* * * * *

UPPER HOUSE COAL COMPANY supply a wonderful article at the price.
Throws down a heavy brown ash. No flame, no heat. Frequently explodes,
scattering the contents of the grate over the largest room.

* * * * *

UPPER HOUSE COAL COMPANY beg to refer intending purchasers to the
accompanying testimonial: "Gentlemen,--Do what I will, I cannot
get your coals to light. Put on in sufficient quantity they will
extinguish any fire. I have worn out three drawing-room pokers in my
endeavours to stir them into a flame, but all to no purpose. Steeped
in petroleum, they might possibly ignite in a double-draught furnace,
though I fancy they would put it out. They are as you advertise them,
a 'show coal for summer use.' Don't send me any more."

* * * * *

CHARLIE AND SARAH.

DEAR MR. PUNCH,--Why should ARISTOTLE be the only author whose works
get discovered? I found the following story, written on papyrus, and
enclosed in a copper cylinder, in my back garden, and I am positive
that it is not ARISTOTLE. Can it possibly have been written by that
amiable and instructive authoress whose stories for children have
recently been reprinted? Yours, &c., HENRY ST. OTLE.

CHARLIE was a very obedient little boy, and his sister SARAH was
a good, patient little girl. One beautiful summer's day they went
to stay for a week with their Uncle WILLIAM, a man of very high
principles, who was not quite used to the proper method with children.
On the evening of their arrival, as they were seated in front of the
fire, CHARLIE lifted up his bright, obedient, beautiful face, and
said, thoughtfully:

"Pray, Uncle WILLIAM, cannot we have one of those instructive and
amusing conversations such as children love, about refraction, and
relativity, and initial velocity, and Mesopotamia generally?"

"Oh, yes, Uncle WILLIAM!" said SARAH, pausing to wipe her patient
little nose; "Our dear Papa is always so pleasant and polysyllabic on
these subjects."

Then Uncle WILLIAM regretted that he had paid less attention in his
youth to the shilling science primers, but he