aus stretch from the rising to
the setting sun. The whole of the Guides and Bengal Cavalry have
resolved themselves into orderlies, and are riding behind the Gryphon.
Tens of thousands of insurgents are lining the road and making holiday
to see the Gryphon pass.

Kabul is astir. Roberts, with bare feet and a rope round his neck,
comes forward, performs _Kadambosi_ and presents the keys of Sherpur
to the Gryphon, who hands them graciously to his Extra Assistant
Deputy Khidmatgar General. The wires are red hot with messages: "The
Gryphon is taking a pill; the Gryphon is bathing; the Gryphon is
breakfasting; the Gryphon is making a joke; the Gryphon has been
bitten by a flea; the wound is not pronounced dangerous, he is
recovering slowly:--Glory, glory to the Gryphon--Amen, amen!"--
YOUR POLITICAL ORPHAN.

No. XXXIX

THE ORPHAN'S GOOD RESOLUTIONS

[June 8, 1880.]

Part I.--Persons I will try to avoid.
" II.--Things I will try to avoid.
" III.--Habits I will try to avoid.
" IV.--Opinions I will try to avoid.
" V.--Circumstances I will try to avoid.

* * * * *

PART I.--BAD COMPANY.

PERSONS I WILL TRY TO AVOID.

1.

He has a villa in the country; but his place of business is in town;
somewhere near Sackville Street. Vulgarity had marked him for her own
at an early age. She had set her mark indelibly on his speech, his
manners, and his habits. When ten years old he had learned to aspirate
his initial vowels; when twelve he had mastered the whole theory and
practice of eating cheese with his knife; at seventeen his mind was
saturated with ribald music of the Vaudeville type.

Reader, you anticipate me? You suppose I refer to one of Mr.
Gladstone's new Ministers, or to one of Lord Beaconsfield's new
Baronets?

You are, of course, mistaken. My man is a tailor; one of the best
tailors in the world. He has made hundreds of coats for me; and he has
sent me hundreds of circulars and bills.

Now, however, he has lost my address, and there seems a coolness
between us. We stand aloof; the scars remaining.

His name is Sartor, and I owe him a good deal of money.

2.

He is always up to the Hills when the weather is unpleasant on the
plains. Butterfly-collecting, singing to a guitar passionate songs of
love and hate, and lying the live-long day on a long chair with a long
tumbler in his hand, and a volume of Long