shape that process--no counsel that ever selled mind could condescend
and say whether it were best to proceed by way of petition and
complaint, AD VINDICTAM PUBLICAM, with consent of his Majesty's
advocate, or by action on the statute for battery PENDENTE LITE, whilk
would be the winning my plea at once, and so getting a back-door out of
court.--By the Regiam, that beef and brandy is unco het at my heart--I
maun try the ale again' (sipped a little beer); 'and the ale's but
cauld, I maun e'en put in the rest of the brandy.'
He was as good as his word, and proceeded in so loud and animated
a style of elocution, thumping the table, drinking and snuffing
alternately, that my father, abandoning all attempts to interrupt him,
sat silent and ashamed, suffering, and anxious for the conclusion of the
scene.
'And then to come back to my pet process of all--my battery and assault
process, when I had the good luck to provoke him to pull my nose at
the very threshold of the court, whilk was the very thing I wanted--Mr.
Pest, ye ken him, Daddie Fairford? Old Pest was for making it out
HAMESUCKEN, for he said the court might be said--said--ugh!--to be my
dwelling-place. I dwell mair there than ony gate else, and the essence
of hamesucken is to strike a man in his dwelling-place--mind that, young
advocate--and so there's hope Plainstanes may be hanged, as many has
for a less matter; for, my lords,--will Pest say to the Justiciary
bodies,--my lords, the Parliament House is Peebles' place of
dwelling, says he--being COMMUNE FORUM, and COMMUNE FORUM EST COMMUNE
DOMICILIUM--Lass, fetch another glass of and score it--time to gae
hame--by the practiques, I cannot find the jug--yet there's twa of them,
I think. By the Regiam, Fairford--Daddie Fairford--lend us twal pennies
to buy sneeshing, mine is done--Macer, call another cause.'
The box fell from his hands, and his body would at the same time have
fallen from the chair, had not I supported him.
'This is intolerable,' said my father--'Call a chairman, James
Wilkinson, to carry this degraded, worthless, drunken beast home.'
When Peter Peebles was removed from this memorable consultation, under
the care of an able-bodied Celt, my father hastily bundled up the
papers, as a showman, whose exhibition has miscarried, hastes to remove
his booth. 'Here are my memoranda, Alan,' he said, in a hurried way;
'look them carefully over--compare them with the processes, and turn
it in your head b
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