to see him unhappy? whether it added to her triumph that
her eyes and lips had turned a man into a fool?--quoting the Lord's Prayer,
with a horrible baseness of blasphemy, as a proof that he had desired not
to be led into temptation, and swearing himself the most tender and
sincere fool in the world. It was from his home at Coxwould that he wrote
the Latin letter, which, I suppose, he was ashamed to put into English. I
find in my copy of the _Letters_, that there is a note of I can't call it
admiration, at Letter 112, which seems to announce that there was a No. 3
to whom the wretched worn-out old scamp was paying his addresses;(167) and
the year after, having come back to his lodgings in Bond Street, with his
_Sentimental Journey_ to launch upon the town, eager as ever for praise
and pleasure; as vain, as wicked, as witty, as false as he had ever been,
death at length seized the feeble wretch, and, on the 18th of March, 1768,
that "bale of cadaverous goods", as he calls his body, was consigned to
Pluto.(168) In his last letter there is one sign of grace--the real
affection with which he entreats a friend to be a guardian to his daughter
Lydia.(169) All his letters to her are artless, kind, affectionate, and
_not_ sentimental; as a hundred pages in his writings are beautiful, and
full, not of surprising humour merely, but of genuine love and kindness. A
perilous trade, indeed, is that of a man who has to bring his tears and
laughter, his recollections, his personal griefs and joys, his private
thoughts and feelings to market, to write them on paper, and sell them for
money. Does he exaggerate his grief, so as to get his reader's pity for a
false sensibility? feign indignation, so as to establish a character for
virtue? elaborate repartees, so that he may pass for a wit? steal from
other authors, and put down the theft to the credit side of his own
reputation for ingenuity and learning? feign originality? affect
benevolence or misanthropy? appeal to the gallery gods with claptraps and
vulgar baits to catch applause?

How much of the paint and emphasis is necessary for the fair business of
the stage, and how much of the rant and rouge is put on for the vanity of
the actor? His audience trusts him: can he trust himself? How much was
deliberate calculation and imposture--how much was false sensibility--and
how much true feeling? Where did the lie begin, and did he know where? and
where did the truth end in the art and scheme