ank God they don't, Daniel!" sighed I, devoutly.
"Never mind,--in that case I could entrance her for hours, talking
about the grounds of difference between Linnaeus and Jussieu. Women like
the star business, they say,--and I could tell her where all the
constellations are; but sure as I tried to get off any sentiment about
them, I'd break down and make myself ridiculous. But what earthly chance
would the greatest philosopher that ever lived have with the woman he
loved, if he depended for her favor on his ability to analyze her
bouquet or tell her when she might look out for the next occultation of
Orion? I can't talk bread-and-butter talk. I can't do any thing that
makes a man even tolerable to a woman!"
"I hope you don't mean that nothing but bread-and-butter talk is
tolerable to a woman!"
"No; but it's necessary to some extent,--at any rate the ability is,--in
order to succeed in society; and it's in society men first meet and
strike women. And oh, Uncle Teddy! I'm such a fish out of water in
society!--such a dreadful floundering fish! When I see her dancing
gracefully as a swan swims, and feel that fellows, like little Jack
Mankyn, who 'don't know twelve times,' can dance to her perfect
admiration; when I see that she likes ease of manners,--and all sorts
of men without an idea in their heads have that,--while I turn all
colors when I speak to her, and am clumsy, and abrupt, and abstracted,
and bad at repartee,--Uncle Teddy! sometimes (though it seems so
ungrateful to father and mother, who have spent such pains for
me)--sometimes, do you know, it seems to me as if I'd exchange all I've
ever learned for the power to make a good appearance before her!"
"Daniel, my boy, it's too much a matter of reflection with you! A woman
is not to be taken by laying plans. If you love the lady (whose name I
don't ask you, because I know you'll tell me as soon as you think best),
you must seek her companionship until you're well enough acquainted with
her to have her regard you as something different from the men whom she
meets merely in society, and judge your qualities by another standard
than that she applies to them. If she's a sensible girl (and God forbid
you should marry her otherwise), she knows that people can't always be
dancing, or holding fans, or running after orange-ice. If she's a girl
capable of appreciating your best points (and woe to you if you marry a
girl who can't!), she'll find them out upon closer inti
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