ire no technical knowledge at all, and, the whole of a
Military Landing Officer's duties being limited to watching other
people working, the Assistant Military Landing Officer's task may
consist of nothing more complicated than watching the Military Landing
Officer watching the military land. If this is so, the work may be so
simple that, once a man has satisfied the very rigid social test to be
passed by all aspirants to so distinguished a position, he must simply
be a silly ass if he doesn't automatically become a great man, after
a walk or two up and down the quay. I repeat, I know nothing whatever
of the calling of A.M.L.O., and I could not tell you without inquiry
whether it is an ancient and honourable profession or an unscrupulous
trade very jealously watched by the Law. I have some friends in it and
I have many friends out of it, and the former should not be inflated
with conceit nor the latter unduly depressed when I pronounce the
deliberate opinion that the best known and greatest thing in the
B.E.F. is without doubt the A.M.L.O. at ----.

Though it is months since I cast eyes on him, I can see him now,
standing self-confidently on his own private quay, with the most chic
of Virginian cigarettes smouldering between his aristocratic lips
and the very latest and most elegant of Bond Street Khaki Neckwear
distinguishing him from the mixed crowd about him. Every one else
is distraught; even matured Generals, used to the simple and
irresponsible task of commanding troops in action, are a little
unnerved by the difficulties and intricacies of embarking oneself
militarily. He on whom all the responsibility rests remains aloof.
A smile, half cynical, plays across his proud face. He knows he has
but to flick the ash from his cigarette and the Army will spring to
attention and the Navy will get feverishly to work. He has but to
express consent by the inclination of his head and sirens will blow,
turbine engines will operate as they would never operate for anybody
else, thousands of tons of shipping will rearrange itself, and even
the sea will become less obstreperous and more circumspect in its
demeanour, adjusting, if need be, its tides to suit his wishes.

I take it my condition is typical when I am "proceeding" (one will
never come and go again in our time; one will always proceed)--when
I am proceeding to the U.K. The whole thing is too good to believe,
and I don't believe it till I have some written and omnipotent