understanding as to precisely where I stood.

If anybody thinks I speak with an unusual degree of feeling, I beg to
inform him or her, as the case may be, that in the matter of wife's
relations I have an unusually full set, and, as my small brother-in-law
says when he orates about his postage-stamp collection, they're all
uncancelled. Into all lives a certain amount of mother-in-law must
fall, but I not only have that, but a grandmother-in-law as well, and
maiden-aunt-in-law, and the Lord knows what else-in-law besides. I must
say that as far as my mother-in-law is concerned I've had more luck
than most men, because Mrs. Talbert comes pretty close to the ideal
in mother-in-legal matters. She is gentle and unoffending. She prefers
minding her own business to assuming a trust control of other people's
affairs, but HER mother--well, I don't wish any ill to Mrs. Evarts, but
if anybody is ambitious to adopt an orphan lady, with advice on tap at
all hours in all matters from winter flannels to the conversion of the
Hottentots, I will cheerfully lead him to the goal of his desires, and
with alacrity surrender to him all my right, title, and interest in
her. At the same time I will give him a quit-claim deed to my
maiden-aunt-in-law--not that Aunt Elizabeth isn't good fun, for she is,
and I enjoy talking to her, and wondering what she will do next fills my
days with a living interest, but I'd like her better if she belonged in
some other fellow's family.

I don't suppose I can blame Maria under all the circumstances for
standing up for the various members of her family when they are
attacked, which she does with much vigorous and at times aggressive
loyalty. We cannot always help ourselves in the matter of our relations.
Some are born relatives, some achieve relatives, and others have
relatives thrust upon them. Maria was born to hers, and according to
all the rules of the game she's got to like them, nay, even cherish and
protect them against the slings and arrows of outrageous criticism. But,
on the other hand, I think she ought to remember that while I achieved
some of them with my eyes open, the rest were thrust upon me when I
was defenceless, and when I find some difficulty in adapting myself to
circumstances, as is frequently the case, she should be more lenient to
my incapacity. The fact that I am a lawyer makes it necessary for me to
toe the mark of respect for the authority of the courts all day, whether
I am filled w