FREE BOOKS

Author's List




PREV.   NEXT  
|<   254   255   256   257   258   259   260   261   262   263   264   265   266   267   268   269   270   271   272   273   274   275   276   277   278  
279   280   281   282   283   284   285   286   287   288   289   290   291   292   293   294   295   296   297   298   299   300   301   302   303   >>   >|  
o young," she said at length. "Twenty-four and twenty-three--" "Not yet," she pleaded, as she rocked herself in distress. "When you will," he said. She bowed her head gravely. The tone of hopelessness in which he said these things grieved her deeply. It had always been a failure between them. Tacitly, she acquiesced in what he felt. And after a week of love he said to his mother suddenly one Sunday night, just as they were going to bed: "I shan't go so much to Miriam's, mother." She was surprised, but she would not ask him anything. "You please yourself," she said. So he went to bed. But there was a new quietness about him which she had wondered at. She almost guessed. She would leave him alone, however. Precipitation might spoil things. She watched him in his loneliness, wondering where he would end. He was sick, and much too quiet for him. There was a perpetual little knitting of his brows, such as she had seen when he was a small baby, and which had been gone for many years. Now it was the same again. And she could do nothing for him. He had to go on alone, make his own way. He continued faithful to Miriam. For one day he had loved her utterly. But it never came again. The sense of failure grew stronger. At first it was only a sadness. Then he began to feel he could not go on. He wanted to run, to go abroad, anything. Gradually he ceased to ask her to have him. Instead of drawing them together, it put them apart. And then he realised, consciously, that it was no good. It was useless trying: it would never be a success between them. For some months he had seen very little of Clara. They had occasionally walked out for half an hour at dinner-time. But he always reserved himself for Miriam. With Clara, however, his brow cleared, and he was gay again. She treated him indulgently, as if he were a child. He thought he did not mind. But deep below the surface it piqued him. Sometimes Miriam said: "What about Clara? I hear nothing of her lately." "I walked with her about twenty minutes yesterday," he replied. "And what did she talk about?" "I don't know. I suppose I did all the jawing--I usually do. I think I was telling her about the strike, and how the women took it." "Yes." So he gave the account of himself. But insidiously, without his knowing it, the warmth he felt for Clara drew him away from Miriam, for whom he felt responsible, and to whom he felt he belonged. He thought he
PREV.   NEXT  
|<   254   255   256   257   258   259   260   261   262   263   264   265   266   267   268   269   270   271   272   273   274   275   276   277   278  
279   280   281   282   283   284   285   286   287   288   289   290   291   292   293   294   295   296   297   298   299   300   301   302   303   >>   >|  



Top keywords:

Miriam

 

mother

 
walked
 

thought

 
twenty
 

things

 

failure

 
wanted
 

occasionally

 

useless


dinner

 

ceased

 

consciously

 
realised
 

months

 

abroad

 
Gradually
 

success

 

Instead

 

drawing


strike
 

telling

 
suppose
 
jawing
 

responsible

 
belonged
 

warmth

 

account

 

insidiously

 

knowing


indulgently

 

treated

 

reserved

 
cleared
 

sadness

 

minutes

 

yesterday

 

replied

 

surface

 

piqued


Sometimes

 

suddenly

 
Sunday
 

deeply

 

Tacitly

 

acquiesced

 

surprised

 

grieved

 

pleaded

 
Twenty