ep down in
his heart, he knows that he will be present. He knows that nine o'clock
will find him in his accustomed seat smiling upon flowing glasses....

* * * * *

I am afraid of tomorrow night. I am afraid of what I will say to Captain
Herrick!

_Friday morning._

I dreamed last night that I was in a great purple forest and again I saw
the black birds with fiery eyes. They were in a circle around me,
judging me. They wanted me to say something or do something, but I did
not know what it was, and I was in despair. Suddenly the trees opened
and I saw a smooth black river pouring over a precipice and the birds
bore me to the river and dropped me into it. Then, as I struggled in the
water, Chris leaped from the bank to save me, but I fought against him
and we were both swept along towards the precipice. He caught me in his
arms, but I struck at him and screamed--and then I awakened.

* * * * *

Seraphine gave me a beautiful prayer or affirmation to say when I am
afraid. I say this over and over again and it comforts me: "_I am God's
child. God is my life, God is my strength. My soul is in unison with the
perfect love of God. There is absolutely nothing to fear. All thoughts
of fear are banished from my mind. I will no longer be bound by
thoughts of fear._"

I shut my eyes tight and say this when I am going to sleep.

CHAPTER IX

THE CONFESSIONAL CLUB

In setting forth the happenings at Roberta Vallis' party (with their
startling psychic consequences to Penelope Wells) it is necessary to say
a word about the Greenwich Village poet Kendall Brown, since he
originated the Confessional Club. This remarkable organization grew out
of a tirade against American hypocrisy made by Kendall one night in a
little Italian restaurant on Bleecker Street.

What was most needed in this country and in all countries, the one thing
that alone could redeem mankind, declared Brown, soaring away on red
wine enthusiasm, was truth. "Let us be honest and outspoken about things
as they are, about men and women as they are," he ran on in his
charmingly plausible way. "We are none of us very important, there isn't
much difference between saints and sinners--I'll argue that point with
any man--_but_ there is one immensely valuable contribution that we can
all make to the general store of life-knowledge, we can speak the exact
truth about ourselves and our experiences,