st, "I am
dissatisfied! Buttermilk and vesper services! Huh! Do you suppose I've
paid two weeks in advance for such a dose? Where's your 'phone?"

With that he calls up New York, gets his chauffeur on the wire, and
orders him to have the car here first thing in the morning, even if he
has to start before light.

"And what is more," says Mr. Ellins, walkin' back to the Doc, "I propose
to buy the rest of this hill and open a real live hotel as close to your
place as I can put it. There'll be something going on in it all the
time, if I have to make everything free, and you can bet your last
dollar the wine list will have something besides buttermilk on it!
There'll be billiard tables, bowling alleys, a dance hall, and a brass
band playing all night. I'll fix your beautiful peace and quiet for
you!"

The Doc, he smiles a kind of sanctified smile and points to the clock.
"In just forty-five minutes," says he, "the lights go out."

That's all the satisfaction Mr. Ellins gets, too; so he takes me in tow
and we beat it 'steen times around the verandas, him stating his
opinions of restoriums in general, Cousin Martha in partic'lar, and now
and then shootin' a sarcastic remark at me. But when he sees the other
victims begin sneakin' off one by one he growls out:

"Well, son, I suppose they'll be locking us out if we don't follow suit.
Get the keys to our rooms."

First off I thought I could have a great snooze; but it's such a blamed
quiet place that I found myself wide awake, with my ear strained to see
if I couldn't hear something. After an hour or so of that, I gets up and
sits by the open window; but as there ain't any moon or any street
lights, it's like starin' down a coalhole.

I was wondering if the country was always as black as that at night, and
what would happen to anyone that strayed out into it, when all of a
sudden I hears a window raised, and way down in the basement under the
dining room I sees a bright light shinin' out. "Hello!" thinks I. "Some
of the help must be bustin' the rules and regulations."

By leanin' out and rubberin' I could look down into the room. And, say,
the shock almost tumbled me out. For there's the Doc sittin' in his
shirtsleeves with four other gents around a green topped table decorated
with stacks of chips. The Doc is just dealin', and before the shade is
pulled down again I had time to see him reach under the lower deck and
haul up a decanter that might have been full of cold t