N. O. P.
Q. R. S. T. U. V. W. X. Y. Z. Y. X. W. V. U. T. S. O. N. M. L. K. J. I.
H. G. F. A. M. little p. little t."

_Lady Bar._ "Beautiful! Superb! Ipsden has been taking lessons on the
thinking instrument."

_Hither._ "He has been _perdu_ among vulgar people."

_Tal._ "And expects a pupil of Herz to play him tunes!"

_Lady Bar._ "What are tunes, Sir Henry?"

_Tal._ "Something I don't play, Lady Barbara."

_Lady Bar._ "I understand you; something we ought to like."

_Ips._ "I have a Stradivarius violin at home. It is yours, Talbot, if
you can define a tune."

_Tal._ "A tune is--everybody knows what."

_Lady Bar._ "A tune is a tune, that is what you meant to say."

_Tal._ "Of course it is."

_Lady Bar._ "Be reasonable, Ipsden; no man can do two things at once;
how can the pupil of Herz condemn a thing and know what it means
contemporaneously?"

_Ips._ "Is the drinking-song in 'Der Freischutz' a tune?"

_Lady Bar._ "It is."

_Ips._ "And the melodies of Handel, are they tunes?"

_Lady Bar. (pathetically)._ "They are! They are!"

_Ips._ "And the 'Russian Anthem,' and the 'Marseillaise,' and 'Ah,
Perdona'?"

_Tal._ "And 'Yankee Doodle'?"

_Lady Bar._ "So that Sir Henry, who prided himself on his ignorance, has
a wide field for its dominion."

_Tal._ "All good violin players do like me; they prelude, not play
tunes."

_Ips._ "Then Heaven be thanked for our blind fiddlers. You like
syllables of sound in unmeaning rotation, and you despise its words, its
purposes, its narrative feats; carry out your principle, it will show
you where you are. Buy a dirty palette for a picture, and dream the
alphabet is a poem."

_Lady Bar., to herself._ "Is this my cousin Richard?"

_Hither._ "Mind, Ipsden, you are a man of property, and there are such
things as commissions _de lunatico."_

_Lady Bar._ "His defense will be that his friends pronounced him insane."

_Ips._ "No; I shall subpoena Talbot's fiddle, cross-examination will get
nothing out of that but, do, re, mi, fa."

_Lady Bar._ "Yes, it will; fa, mi, re, do."

_Tal._ "Violin, if you please."

_Lady Bar._ "Ask Fiddle's pardon, directly."

_Sound of fiddles is heard in the distance._

_Tal._ "How lucky for you, there are fiddles and tunes, and the natives
you are said to favor, why not join them?"

_Ips. (shaking his head solemnly)._ "I dread to encounter another
prelude."

_Hither._ "Come, I know you would like it; it is a wedding-party--two