tter. He said: 'I must have a thousand francs by Thursday.' That
cooled me off a little, you understand. Then he said to me all at once:
'I will sell you my wife.'

"I was full, and I was a widower. You understand, that stirred me up.
I did not know his wife, but she was a woman, wasn't she? I asked him:
'How much would you sell her for?'

"He reflected, or pretended to reflect. When one is full one is not very
clear-headed, and he replied: 'I will sell her by the cubic metre.'

"That did not surprise me, for I was as drunk as he was, and I knew what
a cubic metre is in my business. It is a thousand litres, that suited
me.

"But the price remained to be settled. All depends on the quality. I
said: 'How much do you want a cubic metre?'

"He answered: 'Two thousand francs.'

"I gave a bound like a rabbit, and then I reflected that a woman ought
not to measure more than three hundred litres. So I said: 'That's too
dear.'

"He answered: 'I cannot do it for less. I should lose by it.'

"You understand, one is not a dealer in hogs for nothing. One
understands one's business. But, if he is smart, the seller of bacon, I
am smarter, seeing that I sell them also. Ha, Ha, Ha! So I said to him:
'If she were new, I would not say anything, but she has been married to
you for some time, so she is not as fresh as she was. I will give you
fifteen hundred francs a cubic metre, not a sou more. Will that suit
you?'

"He answered: 'That will do. That's a bargain!'

"I agreed, and we started out, arm in arm. We must help each other in
this world.

"But a fear came to me: 'How can you measure her unless you put her into
the liquid?'

"Then he explained his idea, not without difficulty for he was full. He
said to me: 'I take a barrel, and fill it with water to the brim. I put
her in it. All the water that comes out we will measure, that is the way
to fix it.'

"I said: 'I see, I understand. But this water that overflows will run
away; how are you going to gather it up?'

"Then he began stuffing me and explained to me that all we should
have to do would be to refill the barrel with the water his wife had
displaced as soon as she should have left. All the water we should pour
in would be the measure. I supposed about ten pails; that would be a
cubic metre. He isn't a fool, all the same, when he is drunk, that old
horse.

"To be brief, we reached his house and I took a look at its mistress. A
beautiful woman she certainly was