would be fulfilled.
Thus continuing to deceive each other in all good faith, we got better,
for every letter from C---- C----, telling me how the convalescence of her
friend was progressing, was to me as balm. And as my mind grew more
composed my appetite also grew better, and my health improving day by
day, I soon, though quite unconsciously, began to take pleasure in the
simple ways of Tonine, who now never left me at night before she saw that
I was asleep.
Towards the end of March M---- M---- wrote to me herself, saying that she
believed herself out of danger, and that by taking care she hoped to be
able to leave her room after Easter. I replied that I should not leave
Muran till I had the pleasure of seeing her at the grating, where,
without hurrying ourselves, we could plan the execution of our scheme.
It was now seven weeks since M. de Bragadin had seen me, and thinking
that he would be getting anxious I resolved to go and see him that very
day. Telling Tonine that I should not be back till the evening, I started
for Venice without a cloak, for having gone to Muran masked I had
forgotten to take one. I had spent forty-eight days without going out of
my room, chiefly in tears and distress, and without taking any food. I
had just gone through an experience which flattered my self-esteem. I had
been served by a girl who would have passed for a beauty anywhere in
Europe. She was gentle, thoughtful, and delicate, and without being taxed
with foppishness I think I may say that, if she was not in love with me,
she was at all events inclined to please me to the utmost of her ability;
for all that I had been able to withstand her youthful charms, and I now
scarcely dreaded them. Seeing her every day, I had dispersed my amorous
fancies, and friendship and gratitude seemed to have vanquished all other
feelings, for I was obliged to confess that this charming girl had
lavished on me the most tender and assiduous care.
She had passed whole nights on a chair by my bedside, tending me like a
mother, and never giving me the slightest cause for complaint.
Never had I given her a kiss, never had I allowed myself to undress in
her presence, and never (with one exception) had she come into my room
without being properly dressed. For all that, I knew that I had fought a
battle, and I felt inclined to boast at having won the victory. There was
only one circumstance that vexed me--namely, that I was nearly certain
that neither
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