inner man in a "cafe" with "un
peu de stoot" that we can penetrate by stealth into her bedroom and
air it.

Jean Baptiste is for the moment in disgrace because he has not been to
see Victorine for a week. He is threatened with all sorts of penalties
when he finally decides to present himself. Primarily Victorine is
going to present him with _savon_, which appears in the vernacular to
be the Belgian equivalent for beans. She is also going to wash him the
head.

* * * * *

[Illustration: _First Old Dame._ "WELL, MY DEAR, AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING
FOR THE COUNTRY?"

_Second ditto._ "I AM KNITTING SOCKS FOR THE TROOPS."

_First Old Dame (robustly)._ "KNITTING! _I_ AM LEARNING TO SHOOT!"]

* * * * *

OUR BOOKING-OFFICE.

(_By Mr. Punch's Staff of Learned Clerks._)

_Sir John Lubbock_, whose Life, by Mr. HORACE HUTCHINSON, MACMILLAN
publishes in two volumes, was one of the most honourable men who
figured in public life during the last half-century. He was also one
of the most widely honoured. Under his name on the title-page of the
book appears a prodigious paragraph in small type enumerating the high
distinctions bestowed upon him by British and foreign literary and
scientific bodies. Forestalling the leisure of a bank-holiday I have
counted the list and find it contains no fewer than fifty-two high
distinctions, one for every week of the year. These were won not by
striking genius or brilliant talent. Sir JOHN LUBBOCK, to preserve a
name which the crowning honour of the peerage did not displace in the
public mind, was by nature and daily habit constitutionally
industrious. After Eton he joined his father's banking business. In
his diary under date Christmas Day, 1852, being the nineteenth year of
his age, he gives an account of how he spends his day. It is too long
to quote, but, beginning by "getting up at half-past six," it includes
steady reading in natural history, poetry, political economy, science,
mathematics and German. Breakfast, luncheon and tea are mentioned in
due course; but there is no reference to dinner or supper. These
functions were doubtless regarded by the young student as frivolous
waste of time.

I knew LUBBOCK personally during his long membership of the House of
Commons. He had neither grace of diction nor charm of oratory. But he
had a way of getting Bills through all their stages which exceeded the
average attained by more att