atan from before and behind us."'
'Since when have we owned Sudminster?' sneered the _Parnass_. 'You
might as well talk of expelling the Mayor and the Corporation.'
'I didn't mean by Act of Parliament,' said Mendel. 'We could make his
life a torture.'
'And meantime he makes yours a torture. No, no, the only way is to
appeal to his soul----'
'May it be an atonement for us all!' interrupted Peleg the pawnbroker.
'We must beg him not to destroy religion,' repeated the _Parnass_.
'I thought Mr. Gabriel had done that,' said the _Gabbai_.
'He is only a minister. He has no worldly tact.'
'Then, why don't _you_ go?' said Solomon Barzinsky.
'I have too much worldly tact. The President's visit might seem like
an appeal to authority. It would set up his bristles. Besides, there
wouldn't be me left to appeal to. The congregation must keep some
trump up its sleeve. No, a mere plain member must go, a simple brother
in Israel, to talk to him, heart to heart. You, Barzinsky, are the
very man.'
'No, no, I'm not such a simple brother as all that. I'm in the same
line, and he might take it for trade jealousy.'
'Then Peleg must go.'
'No, no, I'm not worthy to be the _Sheliach Tzibbur_!' (envoy of the
congregation).
The _Parnass_ reassured him as to his merits. 'The congregation could
not have a worthier envoy.'
'But I can't leave my business.'
'You, with your fine grown-up daughters!' cried Barzinsky.
'Don't beshrew them--I will go at once.'
'And these gentlemen must await you here,' said the President, tapping
his snuffbox incongruously at the 'here,' 'in order to continue the
sitting if you fail.'
'I can't wait more than a quarter of an hour,' grumbled various voices
in various keys.
Peleg departed nervously, upborne by the congregational esteem. He
returned without even his own. Instead he carried a bulky barometer.
'You must buy this for the synagogue, gentlemen,' he said. 'It will do
to hang in the lobby.'
The _Parnass_ was the only one left in command of his breath.
'Buy a barometer!' he gasped.
'Well, it isn't any good to _me_,' retorted Peleg angrily.
'Then why did you buy it?' cried the _Gabbai_.
'It was the cheapest article I could get off with.'
'But you didn't go to buy,' said the _Parnass_.
'I know that--but you come into the shop--naturally he takes you for a
customer--he looks so dignified; he strokes his beard--you can't look
a fool, you must----'
'Be one,' sn
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