essrs. Addison and
Roscoe, we are enabled to make you the following offer. If no account is
required of the mesne profits"--

"That's a wrong term," said James, irritably. "Mesne profits refer to
profits derived from real estate. Just like a solicitor to make such
a blunder."

"The term is perfectly appropriate," replied his twin, with warmth.
"There was some real estate, and, therefore, the term can properly be
applied to the whole of the income."

"For Heaven's sake, don't argue but get on!" said Eustace. "Don't you see
that I am on tenterhooks?"

"--my clients," continued John, "are ready to undertake that no appeal
shall be presented to the recent case of Meeson v. Addison and Another.
If, however, the plaintiff insists upon an account, the usual steps will
be taken to bring the matter before a higher court.--Obediently, yours,

"NEWS AND NEWS. John Short, Esq.

"P.S.--An immediate reply will oblige."

"Well, Meeson, what do you say to that?" said John; "but I beg your
pardon, I forgot; perhaps you would like to take counsel's advice," and
he pointed to James, who was rubbing his bald bead indignantly.

"Oh, no, I should not," answered Eustace; "I've quite made up my mind.
Let them stick to their mesne" (here James made a face); "Well, then, to
their middle or intermediate or their anything else profits. No appeals
for me, if I can avoid it. Send News a telegram."

"That," began James, in his most solemn and legal tones, "is a view of
the matter in which I am glad to be able to heartily coincide,
although it seems to me that there are several points, which I will
touch on one by one."

"Good gracious! no," broke in Lady Holmhurst; "but I think it is rather
_mean_ of them, don't you, Mr. Short?"

James looked puzzled. "I do not quite take Lady Holmhurst's point," he
said plaintively.

"Then you must be stupid," said Eustace, "Don't you see the
joke?--'_mesne_ profits,' _mean_ of them?"

"Ah," said James, with satisfaction; "I perceive. Lady Holmhurst does not
seem to be aware that although 'mesne'--a totally erroneous word--is
pronounced 'mean,' it is spelt m-e-s-n-e."

"I stand corrected," said Lady Holmhurst, with a little curtsey. "I
thought that Mr. James Short would take my ignorance into account, and
understand what I _mean_!"

This atrocious pun turned the laugh against the learned James, and then,
the telegram to News and News having been dispatched, they all went in to
the wedding breakfa