our breath grows short and thick, and
pains, and coughs, and shooting aches come upon us at night; it is a
bitter life--a bitter life--joyless life. I would I had never commenced it.
And yet the harsh world scowls upon us: our nerves are broken, and they
wonder we are querulous; our blood curdles, and they ask why we are not
gay; our brain grows dizzy and indistinct (as with me just now), and,
shrugging their shoulders, they whisper their neighbours that we are mad.
I wish I had worked at the plough, and known sleep, and loved
mirth--and--and not been what I am."

"As the Student tittered the last sentence, he bowed down his head, and a
few tears stole silently down his cheek. Walter was greatly affected--it
took him by surprise: nothing in Aram's ordinary demeanour betrayed any
facility to emotion; and he conveyed to all the idea of a man, if not
proud, at least cold."

* * * * *

OLD JESTS.

Persons who gloat over dust and black-letter need scarcely be told that
the best of "modern" jests are almost literally from the antique: in short,
that what we employ to "set the table on a roar" were employed by the wise
men of old to enliven _their_ cups, deep and strong;--that to jest was a
part of the Platonic philosophy, and that the excellent fancies, the
flashes of merriment, of our forefathers, are nightly, nay hourly,
re-echoed for our amusement. Yet such is the whole art of pleasing: what
has pleased will, with certain modifications, continue to please again and
again, until the end of time.

But we may displease; and, as Hamlet says, "We must speak by the card."
The _Athenaeum_ a fortnight since drew forth a batch of these jests with
antique humour richly dight, and here they are. The reader will recognise
many old acquaintances, but he need not touch his hat, lest, his politeness
weary him. These old stories are but "pick'd to be new vann'd."

_Hierocles' Facetiae_.

1. An irritable man went to visit a sick friend, and asked him concerning
his health. The patient was so ill that he could not reply; whereupon the
other in a rage said, "I hope that I may soon fall sick, and then I will
not answer you when you visit me."

2. A speculative gentleman, wishing to teach his horse to do without food,
starved him to death. "I had a great loss," said he; "for, just as he
learned to live without eating, he died."

3. A curious inquirer, desirous to know how he looked when asleep, sat