attached to some toy which he has made
himself, and disdains the costly presents given by his parents. As a
poet has said: "Man only enjoys for long and without remorse the goods
dearly paid for by his efforts." (Sully-Prudhomme: "_Le Bonheur_.")

There is, therefore, a profound psychology in the old and wise saying
that true love expresses itself as often by refusal as by compliance,
and should always associate itself with reason. No doubt this is not
primitive love; it is a love elevated and purified by its combination
with the elements of intelligence.

In marriage, more than one husband thinks he ought to be separated
from his wife and children so as not to spoil them. There is no need
of a long explanation to show the fallacy of this idea. To be
complete, love should be reciprocal, and to remain mutual it requires
mutual education in marriage. Every husband should above all be
separated from himself, and not from his wife. If each one did all in
his power to promote the happiness of the other, this altruistic
effort would strengthen his own sentiments of sympathy. This requires
a constant and loyal effort on each side, but it avoids the illusion
of a false love, provoked by the senses, vanishing like smoke or
becoming changed to hatred. Without being blind to the weaknesses of
his partner he must learn to like them as forming part of the person
to whom he has devoted his heart, and employ all his skill in
correcting them by affection, instead of increasing his own weakness
by leaning on them. It is necessary, therefore, neither to admire nor
to dislike the defects of the loved one, but to try and attenuate them
by aid of integral love.

Love has been defined as "dual egoism." The reciprocal adulation of
two human beings easily degenerates into egoistic enmity toward the
rest of the human race, and this often reacts harmfully on the quality
of love. Human solidarity is too great, especially at the present day,
for such exclusivism in love not to suffer.

I would define ideal love as follows: _After mature consideration, a
man and a woman are led by sexual attraction, combined with harmony of
character, to form a union in which they stimulate each other to
social work, commencing this work with their mutual education and that
of their children._

Such a conception of love refines this sentiment and purifies it to
such an extent that it loses all its pettiness, and it is pettiness
which so often causes it to de