on.

So that Daisy's experiment, whatever may be thought of it, was at least
a successful one.

_TAKEN BY SURPRISE_

BEING THE PERSONAL STATEMENT OF BEDELL GRUNCHER, M.A.

There are certain misconceptions which a man who is prominently before
the public is morally bound to combat--more for the sake of others than
his own--as soon as it becomes probable that the popular estimate of his
character may be shaken, if not shattered, should he hold his peace.
Convinced as I am of this, and having some ground to anticipate that the
next few days may witness a damaging blow to my personal dignity and
influence for good, I have thought it expedient to publish the true
history of an episode which, if unexplained, is only too likely to
prejudice me to a serious extent. Any circumstance that tends to
undermine or lessen the world's reverence for its instructors is a
deplorable calamity, to be averted at all hazards, even when this can
only be effected by disclosures scarcely less painful to a delicate
mind.

For some years I, Bedell Gruncher, have consecrated my poor talents to
the guidance and education of public taste in questions of art and
literature. To do this effectively I have laboured--at the cost of some
personal inconvenience--to acquire a critical style of light and playful
badinage. My lash has ever been wreathed in ribbons of rare texture and
daintiest hues; I have thrown cold water in abundance over the nascent
flames of young ambition--but such water was systematically tinctured
with attar of roses. And in time the articles appearing in various
periodicals above the signature of 'Vitriol' became, I may acknowledge
without false modesty, so many literary events of the first magnitude. I
attribute this to my early recognition of the true function of a critic.
It is not for him to set up sign-posts, or even warning-boards, for
those who run and read. To attain true distinction he should erect a
pillory upon his study table, and start the fun himself with a choice
selection of the literary analogues of the superannuated eggs and futile
kittens which served as projectiles in the past. The public may be
trusted to keep it going, and also to retain a grateful recollection of
the original promoter of the sport. My little weekly and monthly
pillories became instantly popular, for all my kittens were well aimed,
and my eggs broke and stuck in a highly entertaining fashion. We are so
constituted that even the wors