t deal! It
is a humiliating discovery, and I am trying hard to cure myself, but
pride dies slowly! There was a girl at school who was lame. I used to
be so sorry for her, and yet, compared with other misfortunes, it is a
very little thing. I can still move about and use my faculties. It is
not so bad, after all!"
"Yes," said Harold, unexpectedly. "It _is_ very bad. It is a mistake
to pretend to yourself that it is only a small trial, for it's not true,
and the pretence is sure to break down some day, and leave you where you
were. It is a great affliction for people to be crippled, even when
they are old and have lost their energy; but for a girl like you it is
ten times worse. Don't be too hard on yourself, and expect resignation
to come all at once. I believe the best plan is to face it fully, and
to say to yourself, `It's a big test--one of the biggest I could have to
bear. I shall feel the pinch not to-day only, but to-morrow, and the
next year, and as long as I live. It is going to take a big effort to
save myself from growing bitter and discouraged, but it's worth
fighting, for my whole life hangs on the result. If I can succeed--if I
can rise above infirmity, and keep a bright, uncomplaining spirit'--"
He broke off suddenly, and Evie breathed a quick "Yes, yes, I know! I
feel that too. Thank you so much. It is good to talk to someone who
understands. It helps me on."
"Don't thank me. It is like my presumption to venture to preach to you.
But you have helped me so much that when I saw you in trouble I could
not be silent. I was obliged to do what I could."
"I--I have helped you?" repeated Evie, blankly; and a flush of colour
rose in her pale cheeks, which made her look for one moment the happy,
blooming girl of old. "In what way have I ever helped you, or been
anything but an anxiety and care?"
But Harold did not answer, and that was the last chance of a _tete-a-
tete_ conversation that evening, for presently she was carried off to
her own room, and helped into bed, where she lay awake for a long, long
time, staring before her in the twilight, and recalling the lessons of
consolation to which she had just listened. It must surely have been
wonderfully wise, wonderfully true, since it did not so much comfort, as
do away with the very necessity for comfort! She could not delude
herself that she felt sad or despondent, or anything but mysteriously
happy and at rest, as she lay smiling s
|