assistant are old old friends.
And it is thought by pupils that, after pupils are gone to bed, they even
call one another by their christian names in the quiet little parlour.
For, once upon a time on a thunderous afternoon, when Miss Pupford
fainted away without notice, Miss Pupford's assistant (never heard,
before or since, to address her otherwise than as Miss Pupford) ran to
her, crying out, "My dearest Euphemia!" And Euphemia is Miss Pupford's
christian name on the sampler (date picked out) hanging up in the College-
hall, where the two peacocks, terrified to death by some German text that
is waddling down-hill after them out of a cottage, are scuttling away to
hide their profiles in two immense bean-stalks growing out of
flower-pots.

Also, there is a notion latent among pupils, that Miss Pupford was once
in love, and that the beloved object still moves upon this ball. Also,
that he is a public character, and a personage of vast consequence. Also,
that Miss Pupford's assistant knows all about it. For, sometimes of an
afternoon when Miss Pupford has been reading the paper through her little
gold eye-glass (it is necessary to read it on the spot, as the boy calls
for it, with ill-conditioned punctuality, in an hour), she has become
agitated, and has said to her assistant "G!" Then Miss Pupford's
assistant has gone to Miss Pupford, and Miss Pupford has pointed out,
with her eye-glass, G in the paper, and then Miss Pupford's assistant has
read about G, and has shown sympathy. So stimulated has the pupil-mind
been in its time to curiosity on the subject of G, that once, under
temporary circumstances favourable to the bold sally, one fearless pupil
did actually obtain possession of the paper, and range all over it in
search of G, who had been discovered therein by Miss Pupford not ten
minutes before. But no G could be identified, except one capital
offender who had been executed in a state of great hardihood, and it was
not to be supposed that Miss Pupford could ever have loved _him_.
Besides, he couldn't be always being executed. Besides, he got into the
paper again, alive, within a month.

On the whole, it is suspected by the pupil-mind that G is a short chubby
old gentleman, with little black sealing-wax boots up to his knees, whom
a sharply observant pupil, Miss Linx, when she once went to Tunbridge
Wells with Miss Pupford for the holidays, reported on her return
(privately and confidentially) to have seen