ourse, old friend of my father. I have not
the pleasure, indeed, of being personally known to you, but having
received your kind invitation yesterday,' &c. &c.

'No, sir, my name is not Thompson, but Jones,' in highly indignant
accents.

'Jones!' was the well-acted answer: 'why, surely, I cannot have--yes I
must--good heaven! I see it all. My _dear_ sir, what an unfortunate
blunder; wrong house--what must you think of such an intrusion? I am
really at a loss for words in which to apologize; you will permit me to
retire at present, and to-morrow--'

'Pray, don't think of retiring,' rejoined the host, taken with the
appearance and manner of the young man. 'Your friend's table must have
been cleared long ago, if, as you say, four was the hour named, and I am
too happy to be able to offer you a seat at mine.'

It may be easily conceived that the invitation had not to be very often
repeated, and Hook kept the risible muscles of the company upon the
constant stretch, and paid for the entertainment in the only coin with
which he was well supplied.

There was more wit, however, in his visit to a retired watchmaker, who
had got from government a premium of L10,000 for the best chronometer.
Hook was very partial to journeys in search of adventure; a gig, a
lively companion, and sixpence for the first turnpike being generally
all that was requisite; ingenuity supplied the rest. It was on one of
these excursions, that Hook and his friend found themselves in the
neighbourhood of Uxbridge, with a horse and a gig, and not a sixpence to
be found in any pocket. Now a horse and gig are property, but of what
use is a valuable of which you cannot dispose or deposit at a
pawnbroker's, while you are prevented proceeding on your way by that
neat white gate with the neat white box of a house at its side? The only
alternative left to the young men was to drive home again, dinnerless, a
distance of twenty miles, with a jaded horse, or to find gratuitous
accommodation for man and beast. In such a case Sheridan would simply
have driven to the first inn, and by persuasion or stratagem contrived
to elude payment, after having drunk the best wine and eaten the best
dinner the house could afford. Hook was really more refined, as well as
bolder in his pillaging.

The villa of the retired tradesman was perceived, and the gig soon drew
up before the door. The strangers were ushered in to the watchmaker, and
Hook, with great politeness and a seriou