for it, it was beyond my grasp?

At all events, I would never forget _him_. Come what might now, I
would never care for another. I felt quite glad Frank Lovell was as
good as married, and out of the way. The instant I had swallowed my
breakfast I put my bonnet on and rushed into the garden, for I felt as
if fresh air was indispensable to my very existence. The first person
I met amongst the flower-beds was dear old Mr. Lumley. He had hobbled
out on his crutches purposely to give me an interview. I thanked him,
as if he had been my father, for all his kindness; and he talked to me
gently and considerately, as a parent would to a child.

"I promised you, my dear, that they should not fight, and I think I
have kept my word. Your cousin, Miss Coventry, is a noble fellow,"
said the old man, his benevolent features kindling into admiration;
"but I had more difficulty with him than his antagonist. He would not
be satisfied till Captain Lovell had assured him, on his honour, that
you had yourself declined his advances in a manner which admitted of
no misconstruction; and that then, and not till then, he considered
himself free. You were right, my dear--I am an old man, and I take a
great interest in you, so do not think me impertinent--you were right
to have nothing to say to a _roue_ and a gambler.

"I was not always the old cripple you are so forbearing with now. I
lived in the world once, and saw a good deal of life and men. My
experience has convinced me that selfishness is the bane of the
generality of mankind; but that nowhere is it so thoroughly developed
as in those who live what people call 'by their wits,' and enjoy all
the luxuries and pleasures of life by dint of imposing on the world. I
consider Frank Lovell, though we all vote him such a good fellow, one
of that class, and I do not think he would have made a good husband to
my young friend Miss Coventry. Your cousin, my dear, is a character of
another stamp altogether; and if, as I hear everybody say, he is
really to be married to that Welsh girl, I think you will agree with
me that she has got a prize such as falls to the lot of few."

Mr. Lumley was by this time out of breath; but I could not have
answered him to save my life. Like one of his own favourite
house-spiders, I had been unconsciously spinning a web of delightful
self-delusion, and here came the ruthless housemaid and swept it all
away. How blind I must have been not to see it long ago! John might