t good fer 'em to
suck. I ain't got nothing to say 'bout the sulphur, but the phospherus
is sure injurious, an', anyway, it's easy settin' 'emselves afire.
Kids is ter'ble fond of sand, an' gravel, an' mud, inside an' out.
Outside ain't no harm, 'cep' it keps you washin' 'em, but inside's
likely to give 'em colic. Don't let 'em climb on tables an' things.
Ther' never was a kid who could climb on to a table but what could
fall off. Don't let 'em lick stove-black off a hot cookstove. This
don't need explainin' to folk of ord'nary intelligence. Coal is for
makin' a fire, an' ain't good eatin'. Boilin' water has its uses, but
it ain't good play fer kids. Guns an' knives ain't needed fer kids
playin' Injun. These things is jest general notions to kep in your
head fer ord'nary guidance. Kids' clothes needs washin' every
Monday--with soap. Mebbe you'll need to wash every day if kids is
frolicsome. Bow-ties is for Sunday wear. Girl's hair needs braidin'
every night, an' don't leave chewin' t'baccer around. Kids is sure to
eat it. Best give 'em physic every Saturday night, an' bath 'em Sunday
mornin'. Don't use no hand scrubber. If you can't git through the dirt
by ord'nary washin', best leave it. Kids is tender-skinned anyway.
After their bath set 'em out in the sun, an' give 'em an elegant Bible
talk. Ther' ain't nothin' like a Bible talk fer kids. It sets 'em wise
to religion early, an' gives 'em a good impression o' the folks
raisin' 'em. Ef they ast too many questions you need to answer 'em
with discretion--'"

"Wot's she mean by that?" asked Toby, all interest in the mass of
detail.

"Mean? Why--" Bill paused considering.

Sunny looked up from his writing.

"Why, don't say fool things fer the sake of gassin'!" he explained
readily. "Everything you tell 'em needs a moral."

"Moral?" murmured Toby vaguely.

"Yes, moral."

But Sandy saw a chance of restoring his fallen prestige, and promptly
seized upon it.

"Moral," he said, beaming with self-satisfaction, "is handin' a lesson
all wrop up in fancy words so's to set folks cussin' like mad they
can't understand it, an' hatin' themselves when they're told its
meanin'. Now, if I was goin' to show you what a blamed idjut you was
without jest sayin' so--"

"Shut up!" cried Bill. And without waiting for a reply he read on,
"'--with discretion. If you treat kids proper they mostly raise
themselves, which is jest Natur'. Don't worry yourself, 'less they
fall into a swil