EW HOUSE"--a queer sort of menagerie
To hold all his beasts--with an eye to the Treasury.
Into this he has cramm'd such uncommon monstrosities,
Such animals rare, such unique curiosities,
That we wager a CROWN--not to speak it uncivil--
This HOUSE of BULL'S beats Noah's Ark to the devil.
Lest you think that we bounce--the great fault, we confess, of men--
We proceed to detail some few things, as a specimen
Of what are to be found in this novel museum;
As it opens next month, you may all go and see 'em.
Five _Woods_, of five shades, grain, and polish, and gilding,
Are used this diversified chamber in building.
Not a nail, bolt, or screw, you'll discover to lurk in it,
Though six _Smiths_ you will find every evening at work in it.
A _Forman_ and _Master_ you'll see there appended too,
Whose words or instructions are never attended to.
A _Leader_, whom nobody follows; a pair o' _Knights_,
With courage at ninety degrees of old Fahrenheit's;
Full a hundred "Jim Crows," wheeling round about--round about,
Yet only one _Turner_'s this House to be found about.
Of hogs-heads, Lord knows, there are plenty to spare of them,
But only one _Cooper_ is kept to take care of them.
A _Ryder's_ maintain'd, but he's no horse to get upon;
There's a _Packe_ too, and only one _Pusey_ to set upon.
Two _Palmers_ are kept, holy men, in this ill, grim age,
To make every night their Conservative pilgrimage.
A _Fuller_, for scouring old coats and redressing them;
A _Taylor_ to fashion; and _Mangles_ for pressing them.
Two _Stewarts_, two _Fellowes_, a _Clerk_, and a _Baillie_,
To keep order, yet each call'd to order are, daily.
A _Duke_, without dukedom--a matter uncommon--
And _Bowes_, the delight, the enchantment of woman.
This house has a _Tennent_, but ask for the rent of it,
He'd laugh at, and send you to Brussels or Ghent for it.
Of the animals properly call'd so, a sample
We'll give to you gentlefolks now, for example:--
There are _bores_ beyond count, of all ages and sizes,
Yet only one _Hogg_, who both learned and wise is.
There's a _Buck_ and a _Roebuck_, the latter a wicked one,
Whom few like to play with--he makes such a kick at one.
There are _Hawkes_ and a _Heron_, with wings trimm'd to fly upon,
And claws to stick into what prey they set eye upon.
There's a _Fox_, a smart cove, but, poor fellow, no tail he has;
And a _Bruen_--good tusks for a f