'll tickle ye
for a young prince, i'faith.

_P. Henry._ Swearest thou, ungracious boy? henceforth ne'er look on
me. Thou art violently carried away from grace: there is a devil
haunts thee, in the likeness of a fat old man; a tun of man is thy
companion. Why dost thou converse with that trunk of humours, that
bolting-hutch of beastliness, that swoln parcel of dropsies, that
huge bombard of sack, that stuft cloak-bag of guts, that roasted
Manning-tree ox with the pudding in his belly, that reverend vice,
that grey iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity in years?
wherein is he good, but to taste sack and drink it? wherein neat and
cleanly, but to carve a capon and eat it? wherein cunning, but in
craft? wherein crafty, but in villainy? wherein villainous, but in
all things? wherein worthy, but in nothing?

_Falstaff._ I would, your grace would take me with you; whom means
your grace?

_P. Henry._ That villainous, abominable mis-leader of youth,
Falstaff, that old white-bearded Satan.

_Falstaff._ My lord, the man I know.

_P. Henry._ I know thou dost.

_Falstaff._ But to say, I know more harm in him than in myself, were
to say more than I know. That he is old (the more the pity) his
white hairs do witness it: but that he is (saving your reverence) a
whore-master, that I utterly deny. If sack and sugar be a fault, God
help the wicked! if to be old and merry be a sin, then many an old
host that I know is damned: if to be fat be to be hated, then
Pharaoh's lean kine are to be loved. No, my good lord; banish Peto,
banish Bardolph, banish Poins: but for sweet Jack Falstaff, kind Jack
Falstaff, true Jack Falstaff, valiant Jack Falstaff, and therefore
more valiant, being as he is, old Jack Falstaff, banish not him thy
Harry's company; banish plump Jack, and banish all the world.

_P. Henry._ I do, I will.

[_Knocking; and Hostess and Bardolph go out. Re-enter_

BARDOLPH, _running._

_Bardolph._ O, my lord, my lord; the sheriff, with a most monstrous
watch, is at the door.

_Falstaff._ Out, you rogue! play out the play: I have much to say in
the behalf of that Falstaff."

One of the most characteristic descriptions of Sir John is that which Mrs.
Quickly gives of him when he asks her "What is the gr