r an unsuccessful search in the
pantry, he called to his wife, "Mary, where is the pie?" His good
wife timidly acknowledged that there was no pie in the house. Said
her husband, "Then where is the cake?" The poor woman meekly
confessed that the supply of cake was also exhausted; at which the
disappointed husband cried out in a sharp, censorious tone, "Why,
what would you do if somebody should be sick in the night?"

_Woman_ (to tramp)--"I can give you some cold buckwheat cakes and a
piece of mince pie." _Tramp_--(frightened) "What ye say?"
_Woman_--"Cold buckwheat cakes and mince pie." _Tramp_--(heroically)
"Throw in a small bottle of pepsin, Madam, and I'll take the
chances."

GRAVIES AND SAUCES

Gravies for vegetables, sauces for desserts, and similar foods thickened
with flour or cornstarch, are among the most common of the poorly
prepared articles of the _cuisine_, although their proper preparation is
a matter of considerable importance, since neither a thin, watery sauce
nor a stiff, paste-like mixture is at all palatable. The preparation of
gravies and sauces is a very simple matter when governed by that
accuracy of measurement and carefulness of detail which should be
exercised in the preparation of all foods. In consistency, a properly
made sauce should mask the back of the spoon; that is to say, when
dipped into the mixture and lifted out, the metal of the spoon should
not be visible through it as it runs off. The proportion of material
necessary to secure this requisite is one tablespoonful of flour,
slightly rounded, for each half pint of water or stock. If the sauce be
made of milk or fruit juice, a little less flour will be needed. If
cornstarch be used, a scant instead of a full tablespoonful will be
required. The flour, or cornstarch should be first braided or rubbed
perfectly smooth in a very small amount of the liquid reserved for the
purpose (salt or sugar, if any is to be used, being added to the flour
before braiding with the liquid), and then carefully added to the
remaining liquid, which should be actively boiling. It should then be
continuously stirred until it has thickened, when it should be allowed
to cook slowly for five or ten minutes until the starch or flour is well
done. If through any negligence to observe carefully these simple
details, there should be lumps in the sauce, they must be removed before
serving by turning the whole through