orders,
She frequently strove to convince me, how just was my punishment, and
how enormous was my crime: She bad me think myself too happy in saving
my soul by mortifying my body, and even threatened me sometimes with
eternal perdition. Yet as I before observed, She always concluded by
words of encouragement and comfort; and though uttered by Camilla's
lips, I easily recognised the Domina's expressions. Once, and once
only, the Prioress visited me in my dungeon. She then treated me with
the most unrelenting cruelty: She loaded me with reproaches, taunted
me with my frailty, and when I implored her mercy, told me to ask it of
heaven, since I deserved none on earth. She even gazed upon my
lifeless Infant without emotion; and when She left me, I heard her
charge Camilla to increase the hardships of my Captivity. Unfeeling
Woman! But let me check my resentment: She has expiated her errors by
her sad and unexpected death. Peace be with her; and may her crimes be
forgiven in heaven, as I forgive her my sufferings on earth!

Thus did I drag on a miserable existence. Far from growing familiar
with my prison, I beheld it every moment with new horror. The cold
seemed more piercing and bitter, the air more thick and pestilential.
My frame became weak, feverish, and emaciated. I was unable to rise
from the bed of Straw, and exercise my limbs in the narrow limits, to
which the length of my chain permitted me to move. Though exhausted,
faint, and weary, I trembled to profit by the approach of Sleep: My
slumbers were constantly interrupted by some obnoxious Insect crawling
over me.

Sometimes I felt the bloated Toad, hideous and pampered with the
poisonous vapours of the dungeon, dragging his loathsome length along
my bosom: Sometimes the quick cold Lizard rouzed me leaving his slimy
track upon my face, and entangling itself in the tresses of my wild and
matted hair: Often have I at waking found my fingers ringed with the
long worms which bred in the corrupted flesh of my Infant. At such
times I shrieked with terror and disgust, and while I shook off the
reptile, trembled with all a Woman's weakness.

Such was my situation, when Camilla was suddenly taken ill. A
dangerous fever, supposed to be infectious, confined her to her bed.
Every one except the Lay-Sister appointed to nurse her, avoided her
with caution, and feared to catch the disease. She was perfectly
delirious, and by no means capable of attending to me.