m." I just like horror shows anyway, whether girls squeal or not.

"You'll be the life of the party with that 'Hmm' routine."

"It's _your_ party." I shrug.

"Well, you could at least _try_."

We hang around the subway kiosk on Fourteenth Street, where Nick said he'd
meet them. After half an hour they finally show up.

It's nice and sunny, and we see a crowd bunched up over in Union Square,
so we wander over. A shaggy-haired, bearded character is making a speech
all about "They," the bad guys. A lot of sleepy bums are sitting around
letting the speech roll off their ears.

"What is he, a nut or something?" the blonde asks.

"A Commie, maybe," I say. "They're always giving speeches down here.
Willie Sutton, the bank robber, used to sit down here and listen, too.
That's where somebody put the finger on him."

The girls look at each other and laugh like crazy, as if I'd said
something real funny. I catch Nick's eye and glare. O.K., I _tried_. After
this I'll stick to "Hmm."

A beard who is listening to the speech turns and glares at us and says,
"Shush!"

"Aw, go shave yourself!" says Nick, and the girls go off in more hoots.
Nick starts herding them toward Fourteenth Street, and I follow along.

At the Academy Nick goes up to the ticket window, and the girls
immediately fade out to go read the posters and snicker together. I can
see they're not figuring to pay for any tickets, so I cough up for two.

Nick and I try to saunter up to the balcony the way we always do, but the
girls are giggling and dropping their popcorn, so the matron spots us and
motions. "Down here!" She flashes her light in our eyes, and I feel like a
convict while we get packed in with all the kids in the under-sixteen
section.

Nick goes in first, then the blonde, then the redhead and me. The minute
things start getting scary, she tries to grab me, but I stick my hands in
my pockets and say, "Aw, it's just a picture." She looks disgusted.

The next scary bit, she tries to hang onto her girl friend, but the blonde
is already glued onto Nick. Redhead lets out a loud sigh, and I wish I
hadn't ever got into this deal. I can't even enjoy the picture.

We suffer through the two pictures. The little kids make such a racket you
can hardly hear, and the matron keeps shining the light in your eyes so
you can't see. She shines it on the blonde, who is practically sitting in
Nick's lap, and hisses at her to get back. I'm not going to do this again,