ad slackened; she was benumbed with new
sensations, darkness, speed and strength. She had forgotten that this
was a man she leaned against. Then the horse stood still and she felt
Halkett's face near hers, his breath on her cheeks, a new pressure of
his arm and, unable to endure this different nearness, she gave his
binding hand a sharp blow with her knuckles, jerked her head backwards
against his and escaped his grasp; but she had to fall to do it, and
from the ground she heard his chuckle as he looked down at her.
At that moment she would have killed him gladly; she felt her body
soiled by his, but her mind was curiously untouched. It knew no disgust
for his desire nor for her folly, and while she hated him for sitting
there and laughing at her fall, this was still a game she loved and
meant to play. In the heather she sat and glowered at him, but now she
could hardly see his face.
"That was a silly thing to do," she heard him say. "You might easily
have been kicked. What did you do it for?"
She would not own her knowledge of his real offence, and she muttered
angrily, "Galloping like that--"
"Didn't you like it? He's as steady as a rock."
"How could I know that?"
"And I thought you had some pluck."
"I have. I sat quite still."
Again he laughed. "I made you."
"Oh," she burst out. "I'll never trust you again."
"You would if you knew--if you knew--but never mind. I wanted to see you
on a horse. You shall have him to yourself next time. I'll get a side
saddle."
"I don't want one," she said.
"Oh, yes, you do. Let me help you up. Say you forgive me."
With her hand in his she murmured, "But you are always doing something.
And my head aches."
"Does it? I'm sorry. What made it ache?"
"It--I--I bumped myself when I fell."
"Poor little head! It was silly of you, wasn't it? Let me put you on his
back again, and I'll walk you slowly home."
He was faithful to his word, letting her go without a pressure of the
hand, and she crept into the house with the uneasy conviction that Helen
was right, that George wanted the chance he had never had, and her own
responsibility was black over her bed as she tried to sleep. Turning
from side to side and at last sitting up with a jerk, she decided to
evade responsibility by evading George, and with that resolution she
heaved a deep sigh at the prospect of her young life despoiled by duty.
CHAPTER XVI
Zebedee had the lover's gift of finding time
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