e for
How not to do it; sometimes tapping the Speaker, and drawing it fresh
out of him, with a 'First, I will beg you, sir, to inform the House what
Precedent we have for the course into which the honourable gentleman
would precipitate us;' sometimes asking the honourable gentleman to
favour him with his own version of the Precedent; sometimes telling
the honourable gentleman that he (William Barnacle) would search for a
Precedent; and oftentimes crushing the honourable gentleman flat on
the spot by telling him there was no Precedent. But Precedent and
Precipitate were, under all circumstances, the well-matched pair of
battle-horses of this able Circumlocutionist. No matter that the unhappy
honourable gentleman had been trying in vain, for twenty-five years, to
precipitate William Barnacle into this--William Barnacle still put it to
the House, and (at second-hand or so) to the country, whether he was to
be precipitated into this. No matter that it was utterly irreconcilable
with the nature of things and course of events that the wretched
honourable gentleman could possibly produce a Precedent for
this--William Barnacle would nevertheless thank the honourable gentleman
for that ironical cheer, and would close with him upon that issue, and
would tell him to his teeth that there Was NO Precedent for this. It
might perhaps have been objected that the William Barnacle wisdom was
not high wisdom or the earth it bamboozled would never have been made,
or, if made in a rash mistake, would have remained blank mud. But
Precedent and Precipitate together frightened all objection out of most
people.

And there, too, was another Barnacle, a lively one, who had leaped
through twenty places in quick succession, and was always in two or
three at once, and who was the much-respected inventor of an art
which he practised with great success and admiration in all Barnacle
Governments. This was, when he was asked a Parliamentary question on
any one topic, to return an answer on any other. It had done immense
service, and brought him into high esteem with the Circumlocution
Office.

And there, too, was a sprinkling of less distinguished Parliamentary
Barnacles, who had not as yet got anything snug, and were going through
their probation to prove their worthiness. These Barnacles perched upon
staircases and hid in passages, waiting their orders to make houses
or not to make houses; and they did all their hearing, and ohing, and
cheering, an