to spend the first night o' their wedded lives."

"I don't keer ef yo' do shoot me. I'd a heap ruther be shot than not,"
she was saying to Si as Shorty{241} came up. "I've changed my mind
sence I've bin put in here. I'd a heap ruther die than live with Jeff
Hackberry."

"Never knowed married folks to git tired o' one another so soon,"
commented Shorty. "But I should've thought that Jeff' d got tired first.
But this it no time to fool around with fambly jars. Look here, Jeff
Hackberry, you must make that wife o' yourn keep quiet. If she tries to
give another signal we'll tie you up by the thumbs now, besides shoot
you in the mornin'."

"What kin I do with her?" whined Jeff.

"Do with her? You kin make her mind. That's your duty. You're the head
o' the fambly."

"Head o' the fambly?" groaned Jeff, in mournful sarcasm. "Mister, you
don't seem to be acquainted with 'Frony.

"Head o' the fambly," sneered his wife. "He aint the head o' nothin'.
Not the head o' a pin. He haint no more head'n a fishworm."

"Look here, woman," said Shorty, "didn't you promise to love, honor and
obey him?"

"No, I didn't nuther. I said I'd shove, hammer an' belay him. Hit's none
o' yer bizniss, nohow, yo' sneakin' Yankee' what I do to him. You hain't
no call t' mix betwixt him an' me. An' my mouth's my own. I'll use hit
jest as I please, in spite o' yo' an' him, an' 40 others like yo'. Hear
that?"

"Well, you git back into that bed, an' stay there, and don't you dare
give another signal, or I'll buck-and-gag you on your wedding-night."

"Don't you dar tetch me," she said menacingly.

"I aint goin' to tech you. I'm too careful what I{242} touch. But I'll
tie you to that bed and gag you, if you don't do as I say. Get back into
bed at once."

"I ain't gwine t', and yo' can't make me," she said defiantly.

"Take hold of her, Jeff," said Shorty, pulling out his bayonet and giving
that worthy a little prod.

Jeff hesitated until Shorty gave him a more earnest prod, when he
advanced toward his wife, but, as he attempted to lay his hands on her
shoulders, she caught him, gave him a quick twist and a trip, and down
he went; but he had clutched her to save himself from falling, and
brought her down with him. Shorty caught her elbows and called to Si to
bring him a piece of cord, with which he tied her arms. Another piece
bound her ankles. She lay on the floor and railed with all the vehemence
of her vicious tongue.

"Pick her up and la