rge
circle of people who believe that he has some influence with the sunrise
and sunset. Then let him suddenly find himself a ten-year-old boy with
two empty pockets and an appetite for assets, and let him learn that it
isn't considered even an impertinence to spank him whenever he tries to
mix in and air his opinions. I don't believe he would be much more
shocked than the college man who finds, at the conclusion of a glorious
four-year slosh in fame, that he is really just about to begin life, and
that the first thing he must learn is to keep out from under foot and
say "Yes, sir," when the boss barks at him. It's a painful thing,
Burlingame. Took me about a year to think of it without saying "ouch."

The saddest thing about it all is that the two careers don't always
mesh. The college athlete may discover that the only use the world has
for talented shoulder muscles is for hod-carrying purposes. The society
fashion plate may never get the hang of how to earn anything but last
year's model pants; and the fishy-eyed nonentity, who never did anything
more glorious in college than pay his class tax, may be doing a
brokerage business in skyscrapers within ten years.

When I left Siwash and came to New York I guess I was as big as the next
graduate. Of course I hadn't been the one best bet on the campus, but I
knew all the college celebrities well enough to slap them on the backs
and call them by pet names and lend them money. That of course should be
a great assistance in knowing just how to approach the president of a
big city bank and touch him for a cigar in a red-and-gold corset, while
he is telling you to make yourself at home around the place until a job
turns up. Allie Bangs, my chum, went on East with me. We had decided to
rise side by side and to buy the same make of yachts. Of course we were
sensible. We didn't expect to crowd out any magnates the first week or
two. We intended to rise by honest worth, if it took a whole year. All
we asked was that the fellows ahead should take care of themselves and
not hold it against us if we ran over them from behind. We didn't think
we were the biggest men on earth--not yet. That's where we fell down.
We've never had a chance to since. You've got to seize the opportunity
for having a swelled head just as you have for everything else.

It took us just six weeks to get a toe-hold on the earth and establish
our right to breathe our fair share of New York air. At the end of tha