f, she really persuaded
herself that she had not had a moment of weakness. She quite unbosomed
herself, and I fairly assisted at her crisis. It appears that she had
a conscience,--very much so, and even a high ideal of duty. She
represented herself as moving heaven and earth to keep Ambrose Tester up
to the mark, and you would never have guessed from what she told me that
she had entertained ever so faintly the idea of marrying him. I am sure
this was a dreadful perversion, but I forgave it on the score of that
exaltation of which I have spoken. The things she said, and the way she
said them, come back to me, and I thought that if she looked as handsome
as that when she preached virtue to Mr. Tester, it was no wonder he
liked the sermon to be going on perpetually.

"I dare say you know what old friends we are; but that does n't make any
difference, does it? Nothing would induce me to marry him,--I have n't
the smallest intention of marrying again. It is not a time for me to
think of marrying, before his lordship has been dead six months. The
girl is nothing to me; I know nothing about her, and I don't wish to
know; but I should be very, very sorry if she were unhappy. He is the
best friend I ever had, but I don't see that that's any reason I should
marry him, do you?" Lady Vaudeleur appealed to me, but without waiting
for my answers, asking advice in spite of herself, and then remembering
it was beneath her dignity to appear to be in need of it. "I have told
him that if he does n't act properly I shall never speak to him again.
She's a charming girl, every one says, and I have no doubt she will make
him perfectly happy. Men don't feel things like women, I think, and if
they are coddled and flattered they forget the rest. I have no doubt she
is very sufficient for all that. For me, at any rate, once I see a
thing in a certain way, I must abide by that I think people are so
dreadful,--they do such horrible things. They don't seem to think what
one's duty may be. I don't know whether you think much about that, but
really one must at times, don't you think so? Every one is so selfish,
and then, when they have never made an effort or a sacrifice themselves,
they come to you and talk such a lot of hypocrisy. I know so much
better than any one else whether I should marry or not. But I don't
mind telling you that I don't see why I should. I am not in such a bad
position,--with my liberty and a decent maintenance."

In this man