ad tried to acquit myself
conscientiously of my duties as a man. No sacrifice was too great, and
no obstacle appeared insuperable for the cause in which I was engaged.
Looking back upon the past I observe how often I have fallen short and
failed--failed as a burgher and as a leader. And though I do not wish
for another war, I believe I should try to do better were I to live
through it again.

Two of my adjutants--Pieter Hugo and Landman--had remained with me. One
of them instantly went to the nearest railway station, about three miles
off, to call for an ambulance. Till 1 A.M. I lay bleeding in the veldt.
Then the British ambulance arrived. When the doctor saw me he had very
little hope that I would recover. As I was too weak to be removed by
waggon, I was put on a stretcher and carried to a small field hospital,
not far from the spot where I was wounded.

How soon I knew that I was no more a free man! First of all I was
stripped of all my belongings, including watch, chain, and money, etc.
At my urgent request the watch and chain and also a certain amount of my
money were restored to me.

The following morning an ambulance train took me to Naauwpoort Junction.
On the way I had to part with my blanket. And one of the nurses actually
wanted my ring, saying that I might as well give it to her, as it would
be taken from me. This I refused to part with, remarking that I didn't
believe any one would act so shamefully as to rob me of my ring. In this
I was correct.

Arrived at Naauwpoort, I was carried to the hospital, where I was laid
up for three weeks. A screen was posted before my bed, and at my feet
stood a sentinel with fixed bayonet. I was to be completely isolated
from the rest of mankind. Imagine my feelings at having this functionary
at my feet, watching over me and staring in my face day and night. It
was enough to drive me mad. When I could endure it no longer I entreated
one of the sisters to offer my guard a seat, somewhere out of my view,
for his penetrating and unbroken gaze was putting too great a strain on
my already shattered nerves. Surely there was no chance whatsoever for
me to escape, for I could hardly move myself. Besides, the hospital was
so well fenced in and strongly guarded, that all escape was impossible.
My request was partly granted; but I was forbidden to speak to any one,
except to the nurses and the doctor. Neither was any one allowed to
address me. And so the time dragged on heavily and