some religious service on the way. His account of this
little journey is preceded by some instructive reflections on his own
infirmities and lack of ready obedience.

9 _mo_. 15.--I feel exceedingly discouraged at my own obstinacy in
not keeping more humble, watchful, and attentive to the inward monitor. I
am sensible loss is sustained in a religions sense by giving way too much
to an airy disposition.

12 _mo_. 12.--When I consider the many years which have elapsed since
I first enlisted under the Lord's banner, I find cause deeply to reproach
myself for want of a more early and implicit obedience to the _divine
will_; the want of which, I fully believe, has been the means of
plunging me into seas of trouble and years of perplexity. I fear the time
lost will never be redeemed. O, should I ever have to warn others to
beware of the rock on which I have split, surely it may be done through
heartfelt experience indeed! And as the glorious light of the sun begins
mercifully to verge from under the cloud, O, may I never, never forget the
sacred covenant made in the days of my deep distress, that if the Lord
would loosen my bonds, then would I serve him freely.

25_th_.--I went to Thornton to R.W.'s, and next day to Lothersdale
Meeting, accompanied by D.W. and some other part of R.W.'s family. The
forepart of that meeting was very trying, at which I did not wonder, if we
might judge from a previous feeling; for ever since the prospect of this
little visit presented to my view, I felt a load on my spirit which I
could not by any means cast off. On entering the place, I thought, when
our dear Lord sent forth his disciples, he commanded them to take neither
purse nor scrip; and that if this state of poverty of spirit was any badge
of discipleship, some of us might claim to wear it. The language of the
weeping prophet came also before me--"O that my head were waters, and mine
eyes a fountain of tears, that I might weep day and night for the slain of
the daughter of my people." It was hard work for me, a poor stripling, to
have to intimate such close things; but the conclusion was easier to the
natural part, I having to address a few to whom the language seemed to go
forth, of "Mary, the Master is come, and calleth for thee."

I went from thence to the Quarterly Meeting at York, which was thinly
attended. The meeting for worship seemed a cloudy season; however a little
matter impressed my mind which I was thankful in being ena