ide. Yes, we must face that truth, we men; and face it
like men. If we are unhappy in our marriage it is our own fault. It is
the woman who is the weaker, says St Peter, and selfish men are apt to
say, "Then it is the woman's fault, if we are not happy." St Peter says
exactly the opposite. He says,--Because she is the weaker you are the
stronger; and therefore it is your fault if she is not what she should
be; for you are able to help her, and lead her; you took her to your
heart for that very purpose, you swore to cherish her. Because she is
the weaker, you can teach her, help her, improve her character, if you
will. You have more knowledge of life and the world than she has. Dwell
with her according to knowledge, says St Peter; use your experience to
set her right if she be wrong; and use your experience and your strength,
too, to keep down your own temper and your own selfishness toward her, to
bear and forbear, to give and forgive, live and let live. Remember that
you are heirs TOGETHER of the grace of life; and if the grace of life is
not in you, you cannot expect it to be in her. And what is the grace of
life? It must be the grace of Christ. St John says that Christ IS the
Life. And what is the grace of Christ? Christ's grace, Christ's
gracefulness, Christ's beautiful and noble and loving character--the
grace of Christ is Christ's likeness. Do you ask what will Christ give
me? He will give you Himself. He will make you like Himself, partaker
of His grace; and what is that? It is this--to be loving, gentle,
temperate, courteous, condescending, self-sacrificing. Giving honour to
those who are weaker than yourself, just because they are weaker; ready
and willing, ay, and counting it an honour to take trouble for other
people, to be of use to other people, to give way to other people; and,
above all, to the woman who has given herself to you, body and soul.
That is the grace of Christ; that is the grace of life; that is what
makes life worth having: ay, makes it a foretaste of heaven upon earth;
when man and wife are heirs together of the grace of life, of all those
tempers which make life graceful and pleasant, giving way to each other
in everything which is not wrong; studying each other's comfort, taking
each other's advice, shutting their eyes to each other's little failings,
and correcting each other's great failings, not by harsh words, but
silently and kindly,