dessert dishes and
statuettes as well. That's how Corinthian was born; neither one nor the
other, but an amalgam of all. But I prefer glass, if you don't mind my
saying so; it don't stink, and if it didn't break, I'd rather have it
than gold, but it's cheap and common now."

CHAPTER THE FIFTY-FIRST.

"But there was an artisan, once upon a time, who made a glass vial that
couldn't be broken. On that account he was admitted to Caesar with his
gift; then he dashed it upon the floor, when Caesar handed it back to
him. The Emperor was greatly startled, but the artisan picked the vial
up off the pavement, and it was dented, just like a brass bowl would have
been! He took a little hammer out of his tunic and beat out the dent
without any trouble. When he had done that, he thought he would soon be
in Jupiter's heaven, and more especially when Caesar said to him, 'Is
there anyone else who knows how to make this malleable glass? Think
now!' And when he denied that anyone else knew the secret, Caesar
ordered his head chopped off, because if this should get out, we would
think no more of gold than we would of dirt."

CHAPTER THE FIFTY-SECOND.

"And when it comes to silver, I'm a connoisseur; I have goblets as big as
wine-jars, a hundred of 'em more or less, with engraving that shows how
Cassandra killed her sons, and the dead boys are lying so naturally that
you'd think 'em alive. I own a thousand bowls which Mummius left to my
patron, where Daedalus is shown shutting Niobe up in the Trojan horse,
and I also have cups engraved with the gladiatorial contests of Hermeros
and Petraites: they're all heavy, too. I wouldn't sell my taste in these
matters for any money!" A slave dropped a cup while he was running on in
this fashion. Glaring at him, Trimalchio said, "Go hang yourself, since
you're so careless." The boy's lip quivered and he immediately commenced
to beg for mercy. "Why do you pray to me?" Trimalchio demanded, at
this: "I don't intend to be harsh with you, I'm only warning you against
being so awkward." Finally, however, we got him to give the boy a pardon
and no sooner had this been done than the slave started running around
the room crying, "Out with the water and in with the wine!" We all paid
tribute to this joke, but Agamemnon in particular, for he well knew what
strings to pull in order to secure another invitation to dinner. Tickled
by our flattery, and mellowed by the wine, Trimalchi